Recap of last week’s ride to Riley Tavern:

Ten little Drafters bikin’ in a line,
B2 bombed up Midtown and then there were nine.

Nine little Drafters climbin’ Timber in their dinner plate,
Z dropped his chain and then there were eight.

Eight little Drafters pedalin’ under heav’n.
BrickO fell off the pack and then there were seven.

Seven little Drafters talkin’ about hockey sticks,
Coach Arms got distracted and then there were six.

Six little Drafters all alive,
Captain Joe went after Bomber and then there were five.

Five little Drafters, one taller than 6’4”,
Cliff caught the wind like a sail and then there were four.

Four little Short Pours ridin’ on a spree,
Slow Cow took a short cut and then there were three.

Three little thirsty Drafters had the Riley Tavern view,
Lady Digs mysteriously disappeared and then there were two.

Two little Drafters ridin’ in the sun,
KiloWatt and MegaWatt, as good as one.

DRAFTER PHOTO CONTEST UPDATE: in first place is Coach Arms, educating future hockey players on the finer points of Drafting. I’ve been asked for a clarification on the rules of engagement.  I’m making them up as we go along, but I can tell you that you MUST be wearing official Drafter issued gear- socks, headband, hat, shirt, jersey, jacket.  You do NOT need to be cycling, but the activity you are engaging in should be appropriate for display.

The ride for Monday is back to a simpler time, as we will literally be passing through 1881.  Dane’s historic Viaduct was built by the Chicago and Northwesters Railroad. Bicycles have certainly changed since that time, but the simple pleasure of cycling on a country road remains the same.

Viaduct 1881

Bicycle 1886

As daylight is working in our favor (although perhaps not the forecast), we will start increasing our mileage.  The Viaduct route is 35 miles.  There is Short Pour 30 mile option, leaving at 6pm. There is also a 20 mile Shot out to Dane and back.

Garmin: link to Viaduct

PLEASE NOTE: we will be leaving town on a slightly different route than in the past to avoid Pot Hole City on Pheasant Branch.  The Garmin does not reflect the change.

Here’s close up of the cut off points for the 20 (green star) and 30 mile (Blue diamond) options (sounds like a Lucky Charms commercial):

Draft responsibly,

BrickO

Music by Frankie Valley.   Lyrics to “Oh What A Night” Cannibalized by the Drafters

Oh, what a ride.
Late April back in ’17.
What a very special ride for 16,
‘Cause I remember what a ride.

Oh, what a ride.
You know, I didn’t even know his name,
But I was never gonna be the same.
What a Drafter. What a ride.

Oh, I. I got a funny feeling when he flew
Up Enchanted Valley and I,
As I recall it ended none too soon.

Oh, what a climb,
Hypnotizing, mesmerizing me.
He was everything I dreamed I’d be.
B2 Bombing up Enchanted, what a climb!

I felt the east wind like a rolling bolt of thunder
Spinnin’ my helmet around and taking my body under.
Oh, what a ride!

Oh, I. I got a funny feeling when I climbed
Up Enchanted and I,
As I recall it ended none too soon.

Oh, what a ride.
Why’d it take so long find a beer inside?
Seemed so wrong, but now it seems so right.
What a climb, what a ride!

Oh, what a ride!
(Do, do, do, do, do. Do, do, do, do, do, do.)
Oh, what a ride!
(Do, do, do, do, do. Do, do, do, do, do, do.)

A sweet group of 16 showed up to Draft, a nice mix of Red Line and Blue Line riders. I tried to get away from the Varsity/JV distinction, as I felt it might have an inferior connotation. Hence, I put forth the “Short Pour” moniker, but this proved inaccurate during post-ride Free House imbibement. Call them what you may, this group showed up to ride and drink with fervor. And, the shorter route will henceforth be cast in blue (see map below).

The east wind was not kind to the Drafters as we headed due west up Enchanted Valley. My arms were numb as blood flow was desperately redistributed to feed my starving quads. I think my eyeballs were also suffering hypoxia, as I saw the impossible 11.1% grade on my Garmin as B2 Bomber accelerated effortlessly, putting several 100 yards between himself and the next climber, Captain Joe. I’m pleased to introduce the 2017 STRAVA ENCHANTED VALLEY CHAMPION  B2 BOMBER. Oh what a climb.

Not trusting my hypoxic state, I did a little digging to verify the grade of Enchanted Valley. See the following Math Appendix: Bombay Bicycle Club Report

Tobacco City Boy and his Cousin were kind enough to ride sweep. With a 4-week-old newborn, TCB was overheard grumbling, “I knew I was out of shape, but this is ridiculous.” To which his loyal cousin replied, “This is how some of us always ride up Enchanted”. Momma Dan-yelly showed up to Draft after the ride along with Adley, who graced the Free House. Free baby smells were enjoyed by all.

In other riding news, Slow Cow was late to the start and to the finish, as he found himself off route. I should have been more clear on the directions: when I said turn right from Enchanted Valley onto K, I failed to indicate that you should not proceed further past the Dead End sign. Typically, Slow Cow has a trail to follow home, a sort of Hansel and Gretel go Drafting sort of thing. However, Loose Screw showed up with all cleats secure, leaving no metal crumb trail to follow. He still has some screws loose, as evidenced by signing up for the LEADVILLE 100.

Welcome Newbie L-Mac to the Draft. She joins our strong network of former collegiate rowers; Wampus, Ms. Iceland, Krafty and Lady Digs. Way-nuff.

Power Outage: the Electric Company is anticipating a power outage for next week. Spousal partners, KiloWatt and MegaWatt need to settle on the 1000 fold power differential.   Place your bets now. Bookies are saying the odds are 2 to 1 that Mega will become MircroWatt. Mu.

A shout out to the Human Metronome with wishes for a smooth knee surgery on Monday, and a speedy recovery. You will be receiving your Draft card in the mail!

The ride next week will take us to the Riley Tavern.  I’d say the obvious Blue Line route would be to STOP at Riley Tavern and Uber home.  But I’ve posted an alternative below.  Red Line will leave promptly form BMO at 5:30 (Slow Cow, I’m talking to you).

Garmin to Riley Tavern

Blue Line club (AKA Short Pour, JV) leaves at 6pm.  Stay on Timber Ln. Do NOT turn on Mauer Rd.  Rejoin Red Line club on Midtown.

Draft responsibly,

BrickO

Music and most of the lyrics borrowed from GORILLAZ

I am happy, I’m feeling glad

I got sunshine in a bag

I’m indoors but not for long

The Drafters are coming on

I’m happy, I’m feeling glad

I got sunshine in a bag

I’m indoors but not for long

Monday is coming on

It’s coming on

It’s coming on

It’s coming on.

I’ve had a little heart to heart with Mother Nature about easing up a bit on Monday night rainouts. She reminded me that we’ve been gifted several consecutive weekends of gorgeous sunshine (along with beautiful weather on Mondays until 5pm). Mother N said that I wasn’t focusing on the positives (wait, that was my mother), and there are many on this spectacular Sunday. Whatever your beliefs on this day, take a minute to appreciate the many gifts around us. Cookie Monster Christa has shared a few from her cabin up north.

Catch my Draft

If Mother N brings rain, bring your fat tire.

These photos have prompted me to host a competition. If you hold a Drafter card and appear in a photo in Drafter gear, please send. At the end of the season, an award will be given. What will be given, I’ve given no thought. Nor do I really know what criteria will be used to determine the winning photo. Most outrageous? Most spectacular event? Lottery draw? Dunno, but it is fun to see the Drafters out in the wild.

The ride tomorrow should not be a surprise. It’s the same darn one I’ve posted the past few weeks. Short Pour starts at 6pm. If you plan to join that group, PLEASE let me know if advance. See previous post for Short Pour route and Garmin coordinates.

Brighter is better.  While I know you all shine brightly in various ways, please have a light on your bike.

Draft responsibly,

BrickO

We are watching the weather intently, and in case I wasn’t paying attention to the dark sky and thunder clappers, this message popped up on my car GPS while driving home:

However, the radar looks mostly good from here to Ames, with only gentle drizzle coming across the plaines of Iowa.  A few little cells are building, but we won’t know until 5:30 whether the weather will hit.  Winds are NE at 11 knots, which is perfect for our route.  IT WILL BE CHILLY.

If you come to ride, remember to light up.  Visibility will be slightly subpar.  If things go south at wheels up, we can always head to the Free House for shelter.

Please see former post for Garmin link and short ride route.

Draft at your own risk, and draft responsibly,

BrickO

While the Brewers are still on for Opening Day, the Drafters are calling it a rain out.  Our avionic specialists, Capt. Joe and co-pilot Z, have sent weather updates for the area:

According to both sources, the chance of rain is 90%.  While it isn’t a heavy rain, the temperatures have me 100% unenthusiastic.  As such, I am recommending you stay home and rock it on your trainer while watching NC and Gonzaga battle it out.  We will reconvene next Monday for the Home Talent route through historic Ashton.

A few other things to note:

The road quality on Pheasant Branch is extremely poor.  This is one of two main cycling arteries out of town.  We will be rerouting all rides north by using High Street to Balzer to bypass the potholes.  This is important info for those of you who meet us at the Conservancy Trail head, as we will no longer be riding by the parking lots on Pheasant Branch.  I have sent an email to the City of Middleton Director of Public Works/City Engineer, Shawn Stauske, to voice my concerns about cycling safety on Pheasant Branch.  Your voice matters.  Please contact him directly at sstauske@ci.middleton.wi.us or use this link to the website to report your concern:  City of Middleton Public Works Pothole Report

6PM SHORT POUR

Last season, we had a small group of dedicated cyclists who opted to ride a shorter route starting at 6PM.  Kilo Watt and Lads Digs have been elected Team Leaders for the Drafters Short Pour 6PM ride.  While they jokingly refer to themselves as “JV”, this group is chock full of kick butt riders, so I prefer the name “Short Pour”.  If you have any interest in joining the group, please email me directly.

See you all next week.

Draft responsibly, preferably indoors tonight,
BrickO

Take me out to the ball game! It is time to gear up for spring training.  This 20 mile route will include a fly by of the historic Ashton Home Talent Baseball diamond.  Concessions will not be available.

Garmin link to Home Talent 20 mile route

For a shorter route, from Schneider turn R on Vosen, R on K, L on Ripp, R on Riles and back per the route above.

Draft responsibly,

BrickO

For those interested in ordering Drafter jerseys and/or bibs and shorts, please read on.

Men: you can choose between Axis (club cut) and Velocity (race cut) jerseys.  Velocity Pro is not an option.

Women: you can choose between Axis (club cut) and Velocity Pro (race cut) jerseys.  Velocity isn’t available.  Velocity Pro has an additional water proof pocket.  The other difference over Velocity is a narrow elastic arm band.  If you want to spend less money but still have the race cut, go with the men’s Velocity.

The store also includes regular Hincapie items without the Drafter logo for a reduced Team price. If  you want additional items with the Drafter logo, like a jacket, please contact Meredith.

Ordering will close on March 29^th at 11:59PM CST.

The team store is open and ready for ordering! Please follow the instructions below to place your order.

1. Follow the link provided here: https://order.hincapiecustom.com/Brickos
2. Click the “Log On” icon at the top right corner of your screen. Pleasenote this is a brand new ordering site, so you will have to “Create a New Account.”
3. Enter the access code provided here: drafts
4. Shop and add any items to your cart that you would like to order.

If you need to get back to your order a second time to make any changes to your order or add/remove items from your order, please follow the steps below.

1. Follow the link provided here: https://order.hincapiecustom.com/Brickos
2. DO NOT enter the access code, but please log in using the “Log On” icon at the top right corner of your screen.
3. Next, enterthe access code provided here: drafts
4. If you need to add items to your cart, please click on the item you would like to order from the main screen.
5. If you need to edit or remove items from your cart, please click on the cart icon in the top right corner of the screen. Here you will be able to make any necessary changes to your cart.

Once you are done adding/making changes to your order, please log out. The order will save until your team’s payment is open.

Please contact Meredith Newman with questions:

Direct: 864-400-3061 | Main: 864-400-3040

mnewman@hincapiesports.com | http://hincapiecustom.com

Sir Draft-a-Lot

Oh, my, gosh BrickO, look at his shoes.

They are so shiny.

He looks like one of those cycling guys.

But, you know, who understands those cycling guys, anyway?

They only ride with him, because, he looks like a total Drafter.

I mean, his shoes, they are so shiny.

And so went the inaugural ride discussion surrounding the patent leather cycling shoes worn by the Tobacco City Cousin. Banter about Seth Boyden’s  line of cycling shoes gave way to a new tune at an unplanned pit stop on Pheasant Branch Road.  With impressive lightening speed, Z and TCC changed the rear flat and are now being recruited by NASCAR to man their pit stops:

I hate flat tires and I cannot lie

You other Drafters can’t deny

That when a cyclist rides by with a itty bitty bag

With a round tube and tire iron

You get  smug, wanna pull out your pump

‘Cause you notice that tire was flat

And I ain’t down with that

Tobacco City Cousin swept the Inaugural Ride ceremony as he claimed both the First Flat Tire and Foot Fashion awards. A legendary fashion critic was on location at Free House to present the awards, after having been in Norway to capture the finish line fashion photos of the Lillenhammer ski race. (Side note: an emergency meeting had been called to recalculate the 100 beer cargo requirement. I was off by a decimal place. 10 hardly seems worth the hassle.)

Engineer checks the math

Fashion Critic

Choked up with emotion, TCC dedicated the awards to his first cousin once removed, Adley Grace, who joined the Draft (and the world) on March 16. Moved by this gesture, several Drafters ordered the Milk Mustachio Stout to honor Adley, who was at home with Dan-yelly and Tobacco City Daddy getting her milk mustache on.

It was an exiting start to the season, which included 1 newbie and 9 returning Drafters. Billy Boy McC missed the ride but showed up on time to drink beer. Nobody had the heart to tell the Irishman that St. Paddy’s day is over.

Due to a crappy forecast for next week and a high rate of absenteeism over Spring Break, we will not ride  on Monday March 27 and will reconvene on April 3.

Jersey samples are being sent back on Friday, so please contact me if you want to try one on.  Ordering information will be posted soon.

Draft responsibly,

BrickO

Unpredictable. That sums up the commencement of our cycling season. In my near half century occupying this planet (some would argue I’m often occupying another), never have I accumulated over 100 cycling miles in February in the southern reaches of Wisconsin, in shorts. The tell tale signs were starting to appear, as I peeled back my cycling shorts to reveal a glorious tan line. Or maybe it was just a curious aggregate of age spots. Hard to say. And then March rolled in, and my fat tire bike rolled back out to play in the snow. I cannot say with any certainty what March 20^th has in store for the Drafters with respect to riding conditions, but I can say that we will be convening at 5:30 snow or shine.

If the weather cooperates, we will head north out Pheasant Branch to Lodi Springfield Rd, and loop back on Hyer Road. This is a nice 20mile icebreaker, and for those who want a slower start to the season, the bike path along Hwy 12 is a nice alternative. After the ride, or in lieu of the ride should Mother Nature be in a foul mood, we will gather at the Free House for some libations and trying on of the 2017 jerseys.

GPS Hyer Loop

A few gentle reminders about the Drafter Code of Conduct:

• Ride at your own risk. There is no fee to ride and as my Grandma used to say, and probably yours, too, “You get what you pay for”.  There’s no roadside assistance, sag support, controlled intersections, or guarantee for your safety. In short, I am not liable (see Drafter counselors for details- take your pick from the large variety of attorneys at our disposal.  I can vouch for Counselor Queen Bee. I have seen her in action in the courtroom- she throws the book. Unfortunately, she was representing the opposing team).
• Technically, this is not an organized ride. I ride predictably on Mondays; wheels up at 5:30 from the BMO Harris Bank Parking lot, and am happy for company.
• Aptitude requirement: You don’t have to be a stud rider (I most certainly am not) to Draft, although you can be (B2 Bomber and Turbo JT will take first, middle and last pulls), but you can’t be a jerk.   Play nice with others, respect traffic and please come with your tires inflated (note to our Drone Master).
• Bring a spare tire, CO2 or pump. Ideally, you can change a flat. If not, bring a cell phone and be prepared to phone a friend. Or, bring extra beer money. Bribes are strongly encouraged.
• Nobody should ride alone. While I claim no legal responsibility, I do feel morally obligated to make sure everyone has a riding companion. Please be sure to plan accordingly.
• Know your route or bring bread crumbs.  It is your responsibility to find your way back.  GPS and old school maps of my intended route will be posted on the blog.
• This blog will serve as a means by which to post routes and poke fun of one another in a loving and supportive fashion on a weekly basis. It is also the way in which I communicate my thoughts on last minute weather conditions, thanks to Captains Wild Joe and Z , and their high tech aviation technology.  Again, you can choose to ride or not ride, safety first.  You can unsubscribe from the blog at anytime without fear of hurting my feelings.
• Free House generously offers us their outdoor side patio for food and beverages post-ride.  They appreciate a head count in advance for food purposes, as it is easy to overwhelm the kitchen, so you may see me counting heads in the parking lot before we ride out.  Last year, they designated a server on Monday nights just to deal with the Drafters. Tips are strongly encouraged.  Historically, they have taken very good care of us.

In Drafter News:

National News: While many Drafters suffered the American Birkebeiner cancellation blues, all is on schedule for the 54k ski race in Lillehammer. Best wishes to Cookie Monster Wille on her Birkebeinerrennet Ski Race this weekend. While the Irish, including our very own Sully and Billy Boy McC, will be frolicking in the 4 leaf clover patch and drinking green beer, Christa will be skiing along side 30,000 of her closest Norwegian mates. This race originated in 1932 and requires that all skiers carry a backpack weighing 3.5kg throughout the race to symbolize the original Biekebeinere that saved the infant Norwegian king from the rivaling faction. In Drafter conversion, 1oz beer= 0.0253kg, such that nearly 123 oz, or 10 beers would be the required load. I propose a similar feat on our first ride to honor Cookie Monster Wille.

March Madness: Best wishes to Coach Arms and her UW Women’s Hockey Team in their Frozen Four appearance this weekend in St. Louis. Go Badgers!!

Here’s who is covering the game on TV: Link to hockey coverage

Switching from hockey to endurance events, Dan-yelly and Tobacco City Boy have nearly completed their 9month training event. Fortuitously, Baby T is due on the same day as the Birkebeinerrennet Ski Race, which requires a baby be carried during the ceremonial trek across the mountains (see previous Drafter news segment). Baby T is well trained for the event after enduring 16 weeks of Spin, which concluded the end of Feb, just in time to taper for the Norwegian Birke. Drafter Engineers were called upon to manufacture a bumper so that Baby T wouldn’t bump his/her crown on the spin bike handlebars. Patent pending. Baby T will soon be the youngest Drafter, ousting Molly Wampus from her two-year reign.

Breaking Bad: the Netflix sensation took on a Drafter flavor when Sully and cronies rented a Mercedes RV and toured Arizona.  We wished her a safe voyage and were happy upon her recent return.  Happy Retirement, Sully.

Breaking Sully

Retire Responsibly

Bike Fed: your guide to ride can be found here: Bike Fed Ride Guide

Jerseys: Hincapie Sportswear has our 2017 jerseys ready to roll. All that’s required is your credit card. There’s no middleman.  And no financial gain for me personally, and no pressure to buy.  If you are interested and not already on my list, shoot me an email and I will send you the team link to Hincapie Sportswear (available later this week). A quick word: Velocity is a race cut and top-notch material. Velocity Plus includes a waterproof zippered pocket. Lady Drafters: please note the Velocity only has two pockets, while Velocity Plus has 3, in addition to the zippered pocket. Personally, I prefer 3 pockets so have ordered men’s Velocity in the past. Axis is a club cut, a little more generous and less streamline in fit and a slight downgrade in fabric. Shorts and bibs are also available. If you order jackets, vests, etc, the team discount may not apply, as the volume will be low. I will have Velocity samples for sizing available at Free House on March 20^th.

Draft Responsibly,

BrickO

Last call:  rain and hail interfered with our previous Monday night ride plans.  Tonight looks perfect for sneaking in one last (perhaps not?) very short ride to celebrate a wonderful Drafter season.  The Hyer Loop is 20 miles, with a bike path option off of Lodi Springfield Rd for those desiring a quicker path to beer.  If 20 miles isn’t enough of a challenge, you are welcome to continue north towards Lodi and cut over on Kurt Rd, with an unpleasant but not too dangerous stretch on P (left) before turning right onto Stevenson, and ultimately connecting  back to Hyslop.  It’s just shy of 30 miles so you’d have to hustle to get in before dark.  PLEASE bring blinky lights.  The Free House will seat us indoors tonight, so no need to bring your parka and headlamps for dinner.

The best part about Mother Nature’s rain storm last week is that it precipitated one more reason to celebrate.  KiloWatt crushed her first triathlon in Lake Geneva on Saturday.  In an exclusive Drafter interview, KiloWatt confessed that the swim proved the most challenging of the three events, specifically,  apparel orientation.  Wetsuits aren’t clearly marked front and back.  Seems like a design flaw to me (she might have received some poor instruction by a certain somebody…).

Earned it.

Newbies unite.

PDF download hyer-loop-20

Garmin link to Hyper Loop

Spin Update: spin has officially sold out for the fall session, which is a first and I’m stoked to crank the tunes and the pedals with you. First class is Oct 10.   If you have not paid, please do so by this Friday. There may be a few spots opening up for the 90min winter session starting in Jan.  Email me if you are interested.

Draft responsibly,

BrickO