GroupMe notes the address. Staggered start, beginning at 4:30. Garden drinks afterwards.
GPS Link: https://ridewithgps.com/routes/33985612
Only a few hills on this route. Octane is acclimated.
Keez, not so much.
Draft responsibly,
BrickO
The last ride in August was perhaps the most scenic. Pleasant Valley and Old Indian were new to many Drafters, but riding them felt as old as time itself. The staggered start for this 40 mile adventure spread out 16 Drafters, but all came together at the Ring of Fire.
Ring of Fire may have you thinking of the Man in Black, but you should be thinking about the US Forest Service.
With a Drafter’s hat and bottle, and a kit of Hincap-ies you will
find him on Glacier Ridge always sniffin’ at the breeze. People
stop and pay attention when he tells em’ to be-ware, ‘cause
ev’-ry-bo-dy knows that he’s the fire pre-ventin’ Chair.
You can take a tip from Speedy and there’s nothin’ like a blow, cause they’re
good for spreading Covid and igniting flames real slow, you just
have to look a-round you and you’ll find it’s not a joke, to
see what you’d be mis-sin’ if you weren’t blinded by the smoke.
You can call upon the Bomber and he’ll make you feel the heat, you won’t
cough and choke and tear up any -more, you won’t retreat. He will
let you take his pizza and pre-tend he’s not so smart, but
don’t you dis his fire for he has Pyro in his heart.
NO RIDE ORGANIZED DRAFTER LABOR DAY. The following Monday, Sept 14, we will be departing from Cannibal’s house between 4:30 and 5PM. Garden drinks will be provided. The route looks to be roughly 25miles. Check GroupMe for the address and hopefully cue sheet/map/GPS link will be provided before the gin.
Draft responsbily,
BrickO
The Lovin’ Spoonful had words for our Waunakee Warriors Ride:
Hot ride, summer in the city
Back of my neck getting dirty and gritty
Hyslop, isn’t it a pity
Doesn’t seem to be a shadow in the city
All around, people looking Covid
Walking on the sidewalk, hotter with a mask head
But at night it’s a different world
Ride back and grab a beer
Come-on come-on and draft all night
Despite the heat it’ll be alright
We had the biggest turnout of the season, with 2 dozens Drafters baking in the sun and another 4 who rode a full day early to beat the heat.
Sunday riders included Bomber and Bell, and Duchess and Sandlot, who rode the Trek 100 the day before and still had enough strength to strike a Warrior Pose.
Two dozen Drafters weren’t the only thing baking on Monday. Gopher had been busy in the kitchen. Sensitive to Cookie Monster’s contributions the previous week, and not wanting to step on her oven mitts, he baked brownies for the Drafters.
The Drafters dug into Gopher’s browniesCovid is also heating up, so we took extra measures to social distance. Captain Joe once again pulled a Captain Solo, riding at noon. Small chance the virus could do anything but waive a white flag in the heat of the day.
Captain Solo riding at high noon.Columbus set sail at 4:10, with college roomie, good friend and Newbie Daisy. Not too many living things thrive in direct sun, but this flower could be one.
The B teams divided up and set off around 4:30.
B-2: Loose Screw, Pit Stop, Speedy and FooterThe B-1 team included Newbie Helios. When you ride on the hotest Monday of the year… on a gravel bike… and bring the heat, you earn the titel of Greek God of the Sun.
B-1: Slinger, Z Wrecks, Billy Boy and Helios (Gopher awaits the A-2 team). Duracell joined the B-1 Draft on Balzer.
Billy Boy separates from the B team when he takes a left on Johnson.Dan-yelly towed the line for the 4:43 group, while the A team further subdivided into A- (BrickO, Skipper, LuLu and Gopher) and A+ (Cannibal, Blurple, Rimshot and Booker J) teams.
A- team: Gopher, LuLu, BrickO (photo by Skipper).BrickO promised Gopher the ride was going to be “pretty flat”. After Viaduct and Cuba Valley, the MI native realized, “We aren’t in Detroit anymore.” There was more elevation change leaving Middleton Hills than in the entire Motor City.
Late to the party: Vintage and Thing 1 rode the course backwards, meeting up with the A- team on Cuba Valley. Tick Tock staggered from home, while Octane gased up undetected.
Vintage does a U-turn to join the A- team.We all rode apart but came together, within limits, for pizza, beer and Gopher’s brownies.
Tick Tock, Capt Joe, Gopher, Columbus & LuLu, Cannibal, Rimshot, Blurple, Booker J, Octane, Loose Screw, Daisy, Speedy, Pit Stop, Slinger and FooterIn other Drafter news:
A shout out to Pres for hammering out a Century!
Pres knocks down 100 milesLast Wednesday was the biggest Dirty Draft turn-out. 7 Drafters enjoyed the amazing trail upgrades at Blackhawk. Huge thanks to Skipper for breaking trail and taking action photos.
Footer, Stout, LuLu, BrickO, Slinger and Octane (photo compliments of Skipper)
To closeout the month August, we will go long. *** B Team START AT 4PM. Other Drafters stagger at 4:15 (A-) and 4:45 (A+). A short pour is always an option when ordering your Draft. If you come at 5PM and want to ride the full 40 mile route, go for it.
This is a new route, or at least two new roads incorporated into the existing Back Door to Church route. Pleasant Valley and Old Indian are beauties. It isn’t always Pleasant Getting Old, but I thought combining these two roads wasn’t a bad way to spend a day in the second half of my century.
RidewithGPS Pleasant Getting Old
Download Map and Cue Sheet: Pleasant Getting Old
For those looking for a short pour, I’d suggest Brains and Braun (though we should confirm that Braun is open for business).
GPS link: Brains and Brawn
Download Map and Cue Sheet (warning RidewGPS is being feisty, and I’m too tired to battle with it- use map with caution): Brains and Brawn
Draft resposibly,
BrickO
No Draft is comlete without a ride down Easy Street. Please use updated map and cuesheet: Waunakee Warrior Ride
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TOBACCO CITY BOY!
Draft responsibly,
BrickO
The Four Seasons said it best:
Oh, what a night
Late August Monday back in ’20
What a very special ride for me
As I remember, what a night
Oh, what a night, two newbies didn’t even know their names
But the Draft was never gonna be the same
What a route, what a night
Oh, I, I got a funny feelin’ when they buzzed by on Breunig
Oh my, as I recall it ended much too soon
Oh what a night, Cookie Monster back drafting with me
She was as fit as we imagined she’d be
Thirty-eight miles, what a night
Nothing is perfect, but dare to find flaw with the Brewing on Breunig ride. Zero humidity and a tail wind back to Columbus and LuLu’s where pizza, cookies and beer were in abundant supply.
The B team was off to a Speedy and lonely start…
Off to a Speedy startbut shortly therafter expanded and quickly slowed. The B Team could not be bothered with high watts with so much energy being consumed catching up socially. Ultimatley, the B Team divided up into his and hers.
Chick’s B Team: Footer, BrickO, Speedy and Cookie MonsterCookie Monster re-enlisted in the Draft after taking a few weeks off. And by “off” I mean balancing motherhood and graduate school. Of couse she had time to bake two dozen cookies for all of us to enjoy.
Boy’s B Team: Duracell, Mario and QueenieThe Boy’s B Team included Queenie’s son, Newbie Mario. “A father-son relationship is strong, like no other teammates. You could be straightforward with one another.” Mario Andretti
“If everything seems under control, you’re just not going fast enough.” Mario AndrettiMario rode plenty fast on his borrowed machine, a Colnago named Annie. He was seen stroking her gently after riding her hard.
The A team also traveled light to start. Captain Joe took the staggered start seriuosly, soloing at noon.
Captain SoloThe rest of the A Team took off at 5PM and caught the Chick’s B Team on Loper.
LuLu and Cannibal overtake the Chick’s B Team
Skipper and Cannibal after the take overThe A Team also welcomed a Newbie, Gopher. He certainly did Go Far, farther than Vintage (yes, we have officially leap frogged from Kermit back to his old handle), who declared a state of overtraining and cut off at KP to start his rest interval before an alleged upcoming 130 mile gravel event.
Gopher and Cannibal catching LuLu’s DraftBack at the ranch, the Drafters were reunited with Booker J, whose GPS apparently took him from LuLu’s house to the typical start on Glacier Ridge Rd. “I knew something was wrong when my Garmin didn’t send balloons at the finish. I was worried that starting from LuLu’s might turn a 30 mile route into a 60 mile route. But I didn’t think it would congratulate me on a 2 mile course.” And so, Booker J rode his own route and joined the crew for cookies and beer. There might be something wrong with his Garmin. “My Garmin says all my rides are at 21 mph.”
LuLu, Footer, BrickO, Gopher, Queenie, Mario, Speedy, Duracell, Bomber, Belle, Columbus, Booker J. Drafting but not imbibing: Tick Tock, Vintage and Cannibal.Back yard banter focused on the Newbies. Mario recevied a penatly flag on his first lap with the Drafters. Not recognize Cookie Monster as his instructor for fall semester, he failed to yield.
BrickO and Belle, proud ISU supporter and alumna, respectively, welcomed the Iowa Native Newbie. “I started a Cyclone, but ended up a Hawkeye.” That’s the equivalent of confessing, “I started a Badger, but ended up a Gopher.”
Next week we will head to Waunakee for a 33 mile Warrior Ride. Depart from Glacier Ridge Rd in staggered format, starting at 4:30PM. Pizza and a bonfire to follow, if the fall weather persists. VINTAGE NIGHT: One free beer to any Drafter wearing the original Voler jersey or blue and red Hincapie jersey.
GPS link: Waunakee Warrior Ride
Download map and cue sheet: Waunakee Warrior Ride
Draft responsibly,
BrickO
Brewing on Breunig is on for tonight. The weather looks fabulous.
REMINDER: LuLu is hosting. CHECK GROUPME for directions for the start near Lakeview Park, Middleton. Staggered start: 4:30, 4:45, 5:00 and 5:15PM. Bring a lawn chair and beverage. Pizza and mixed drinks provided. Rumor has it that Cookie Monster may be making her first post-baby delivery debut.
Sandlot and Duchess have done recon and report the course to be in great shape.
FishNBoots and his Funtathalon recruiter also did a bit of recon. Make that TWO 7-mile rides this summer: a peak AND a taper. This couple is sporting the Vintage Drafter jersey circa 2013. Next week, free beer to those Drafting in Vintage appearal. Limit one per customer. This will be an excellent way to celebrate the upcoming BIRTHDAY of Vintage Drafter Tobacco City Boy!
The Dirty Draft has had some success rolling on Wednesday evenings. We welcome all ages.
There are inherent risks that must be assumed. For example, this Drafter and Funtathlete contracted a case of Dirty Drafter Digit yesterday. HIPPA prohibits that his name be posted, but you may Sherlock it tonight when you see taped fingers over a bike glove.
Draft responsibly,
BrickO
Sadly, the rain kept us from drafting to Church, For Sho. And with construction underway in Cross Plaines for the new subdivision off of KP, we should rethink our rain day make up route. IF ANYBODY WOULD BE INTERESTED IN HOSTING, PLEASE SHOOT ME A TEXT. Thanks. Otherwise, staggered start per norm 4:30, 4:45, 5:00 and 5:15. BE SURE TO TURN ON YOUR DRAFTER GROUPME NOTIFICATIONS. Weather updates and other last minute updates are posted through GroupMe. It also allows communication with other Drafters without needing their cell phone (good for emergencies).
Here’s what is on tap: a 38 mile ride north called Brewing on Breunig.
Garmin Link Brewing on Breunig
Download PDF map and cuesheet: Brewing on Breunig
Drafter handle update: Drafter handles are usually non-negotiable. Derby did not submit a request for a handle change, but the Drafter Board of Directors convened and ruled her handle inaccurate. While the Dark and Derby powerhouse team took first place in the Funtathalon, it was the Dark Knight who completed the derby portion of the event. His teammate, clearly the stronger of the two, sped to victory with a lightening FLASH run split.
Bronze, Silver and Finisher medalsHere’s a shout out to another humble Drafter who was on standby in case Keez needed a teammate for the Funtathalon. Luckily, Tinder came through with a match and Cookie Monster was able to do her own Funtathalon with family.
E$ and Cookie Monster enjoying their own FuntathalonDraft responsibly,
BrickO
The Wisconsin State Journal ran a full-page recap of the First Annual Funtathalon. Missed it? Not to worry. The Drafter blog has exclusive rights to the story.
The day started well before the canoes and kayaks hit the water. Master blowers, Nurse Sully and Counselor Queen Bee were clearing the path for the skaters. “That’s not my match.com name”, noted Counselor Queen Bee. Billy Boy was also armed and dangerous with a leaf blower, clearing the bike course and rechecking route arrows. The Legend and family tested the waters of Lake Mendota, getting in some barefootin’ sets before sunup.
The medical tent was buzzing with pre-race activity, and negotiations with race officials for medical conditions started the night before the Funtathalon. Footer, of team LRST 2.0 (Lake Ripley Ski Team), served double duty as the official race Physical Therapist for the geriatric division. Speedy and Ninja treated knee maladies with frozen peas and Kinesio Tape, respectively. Octane had his calf dressed with the latter.
Race officials approved two last minute additions. Special K of Team Divockuf failed to properly taper for the event, squeezing in a 100-mile run the week before instead of peaking for the Funtathalon. There was nothing our team of medical professionals could do for her. FishNBoots stepped up, well tapered. Over the past 4 weeks, he accumulated 7 miles of bike training. After signing his medical waiver, FishNBoots remembered that his primary care physician ordered an EKG at his last physical, which he forgot to schedule.
Team 10/10 was a team of one until last week, when fellow ISU Cyclone agreed to join Keez as part of their Tinder agreement.
As 10 teams entered Lake Mendota, they were welcomed by the Aquatic Course Marshals. The MasterCraft, manned by Dub and friends, was anchored 1.5 miles south of the boat launch towards Spring Harbor, serving as the turn-around point.
A standby emergency boat, driven by The Legend and accompanied by Harrison, Spencer, Phoenix and 2 dogs, was thankfully not called upon to rescue anyone.
The only tip over occurred before the race began. Team Space Cartographers scrambled to change water craft after Kermit rolled his kayak, losing the team baton before the race began. Divers were unable to recover the baton, but course officials allowed the Space Cartographers to proceed once a replacement baton was secured. Despite the late start, Kermit optimistically approached the start, “I’m in my natural habitat.”
Kermit still on land, finding his way to the water, 9 paddlers lined up for the 3-mile paddle. Z Wrecks gave the official “Paddlers, take your mark, GO!”
Bomber set a blistering pace, finishing in just over 30 minutes. The lake temperature increased 2 degrees as his blades burned through the algae-rich waters of Mendota. Octane was the next paddler to reach the shore.
Skipper, a natural paddler, struggled to perform in his kayak. “A cow tank would have been faster.”
Pipes enjoyed her time on the lake, soaking up the morning sun and entering the transition area in tenth place. Some spectators had anticipated a first place showing by the two-time Olympic rower. That’s like expecting Katie Ledecky to win the diving competition just because both events involve water, or Lindsey Vonn to win the Birkebeiner because both events are on snow. In an exclusive interview with the Divockuf team-member, she reminded us that, “Slow lives matter.”
The first bonus round of corn hole proved challenging due to forearm fatigue following the paddle. None of the 10 teams earned bonus points, and only Pipes pulled the Team Divockuf with a scratch score. The Cyclone struggled the most with 4 additional minutes tagged onto Team 10/10’s time.
Things really heated up during the 7-mile run through the Conservancy. Runners maintained proper hydration and orientation thanks to the volunteers. The soccer bonus station had no penalties, although Belle from Team Brandany Alliance, focused on her run, failed to stop at the bonus station. Funtathletes who scored the most goals, thereby subtracting minutes off their final time, strategized by passing the ball rather than attempting a free kick. This tactic will be reviewed in 2021 Funtathalon Official Rules and Regulations.
Team Dark n Derby had the fastest run split and was first to the transition, executing an unorthodox but smooth baton hand off.
Waiting for the runners in the transition area, skaters experienced some technical difficulties. Ninja, a former competitive inline skater, failed to check her 20 plus year-old custom Bonts. The first thing to break was her skate lace. More significant equipment failures were on the horizon.
Loose Screw, after generously providing several Funtathletes with water crafts and loading them back onto his trailer, was left at the boat launch transition area without truck keys. Billy Boy, honorably executing his bike course sweeping duties, inadvertently left the launch with his leaf blower and Loose Screw’s keys. This delayed Loose Screw’s arrival at the Park and Ride transition area, and his subsequent departure on the skate leg.
The skate leg of the Funtathalon clearly illustrated the top end speed differential of inline skates versus roller skis. The ruling on drag coefficient of clothing was also questioned and will need to be reviewed by Race Officials. Some Funtathletes opted to change out of their event t-shirts into a more aerodynamic wardrobe, while others took the parachute approach.
Surprisingly, perhaps, the skate event had many elite competitors. Speedy’s college hockey career as player and coach was obvious as she exited the transition area hitting 0-60 in 5 seconds. The crowd gasped at her gracefulness. And her abrupt 60 to 0 stop when the American member of Team CanAm called out, “You forgot the baton. Sheesh. I gave the kids one job…”
Those Funtathletes who opted for roller skis had a slower road. Loose Screw got off to a slow start to begin with (see key fiasco above). FishNBoots, with only 12 hours of notice, didn’t have time to repair his roller skis, which had lost their ability to track in a straight line.
Thing 1 had never been on roller skis. “How hard can they be?” Turns out, pretty hard. Thing 1 started the “Crash Support Group”. Membership will be capped at 3, and is already full. Keez made it to the intersection with County Hwy K before crashing, which is a few hundred yards further than Thing 1 made it.
BrickO was excited to help out young Keez, stepping in for the skate, horse shoes and whiskey leg. She was only an asset with the latter.
The whiskey station, supervised by Nurse Sully and Counselor Queen Bee, was the hub for negotiations.
Billy Boy served as a surrogate for those without adequate liver training and alcohol dehydrogenase activity. He provided support for three Funtathletes, including a clever negotiation by the Dark Knight who did his own shot and then bartered with Sully and Queen Bee for an extra minute off for Bill to imbibe. Pipes, epitomizing the Funtathlete spirit, drove to the Missouri Tavern to offer support to her teammate, FishNBoots. Team Divockuf negotiated 2 shots each, for a total of 4 minutes off of their time. Footer hung out a little longer to share a shot with BrickO, and provide draft protection back home.
One skater took off her skates and hung them up after the whiskey shot. Ninja salvaged the broken shoe lace, but could not salvage the race when her boot and skate bed detached. There aren’t enough shots to make up that loss.
Hores shoes on rollerskates or skis after a whiskey should not be attempted without supervision.
The transition from skating to cycling was thankfully uneventful. FishNBoots was the last skater into transition. Footer of Team LRST 2.0, left before her brother-in-law arrived. “I’ve spent most of my life waiting for him.” She had to wait a little longer, as Footer required some assistance driving LRST 2.0 teammate’s Audi to the finish. “How do you start this thing?” Despite the heroic efforts at the whiskey bonus station, Team Divockuf did not make the time cut off, and had to forego the cycling event.
Cycling seemed to be the safest of the 4 events. The Legend and sons were on the route with water and to verify no short cuts were taken. Belle blew by the station at top speed, missing the check in point. A little blood was spilled during the maneuver back to the check point. No law suits were filed. Luckily, the Crash Support Group formed in the previous event had one memberhip spot available.
Vetting by the Race Officials of the last-minute entry for Team 10/10 (aka Team Tinder) did not discover his Category 1 status. The Cyclone made up for lost time: the 4 min bags penalty and the skate crash by teammate Keez fueled him to finish with the fastest bike split. By a lot. Bomber requested to be friends on Strava.
Skipper had negotiated bonus points with a Peter Sagan wheelie finish, but paddling a cow tank left his tank empty.
Duchess of Team Lantern Rouge lived up to his name. “I lost by less than a minute to a guy who drove to the finish line?”
The energy to shoot baskets was a limiting factor for all Funtathletes. Bomber was quick to point out a confounding variable, “Nobody could train for this event. The gyms are closed.” With more practice, the basketball bonus round may have proved more fruitful. Duracell of Team CanAm brought the most game to the basketball bonus round. Kermit brought the most style.
Nico and Billy Boy will be official basketball surrogates for Funtathalon 2021. Billy Boy made as many baskets as he did shots!
Congratulation to the 2020 First Annual Funtathalon winners and all participants.
On the podium:
A big thanks to all of our volunteers:
Paddle: Wyatt and friends, The Legend and sons, Phoenix and 2 dogs
Run: Nurse Sully, Counselor Queen Bee, Kaia, Helen, Ma Brick and Revel
Soccer: Z Wrecks, Nico and Jordy
Park and Ride Transition: Finn, Nico and Jordy
Skate Course: Master Blowers Nurse Sully and Counselor Queen Bee
Horse Shoes: Z Wrecks
Whiskey: Nurse Sully, Counselor Queen Bee, Billy Boy
Bike: Paul & Harrison, Billy Boy, Thing 1 & Kermit for route arrow pick up on Sunday
Basketball: Nico, Jordy and Billy Boy
And our spectators and fans:
Tobacco City Boy and Family
Coach Arms and Smiley Riley
Gwyneth (who mandated FishNBoots participate, and skip the bike) and Anna
Special K
And our t-shirt and trophy suppliers:
SweatVac
ReGeared
Draft responsibly,
BrickO
The first Draft of August brought a hint of fall. 21 Drafters explored the woods of Wisconsin, some with arm warmers and one particular California native in full winter apparel.
The staggered start was executed beautifully. Dark Knight and Derby (who is awaiting new Drafter handle assignnment, as Dark Knight will serve both Dark n Derby roles in the upcoming Funtathalon) left at 3:15, leaving plenty of time to shower and shave before enjoying the post-draft festivities. Derby is not the only one seeking a new identity. The Dark Knight showed little knightliness. The Draft caught sight of the power couple on Kingsely (how prophetic), with the Dark Knight well out of Draft range, leaving Derby without protection. You never, never leave your wingman. John Denver warned against this behavior:
Almost heaven, Wisconsin
Middleton Hills, Viaduct Road to Dane
I feel old there, older in my knees
Younger than the mountains, draftin’ in the breeze
Country roads, take me home
To the place I belong
Wisconsin, mountain Dark Knight
Take me home, country roads
Dark and Derby, ridin’ on Kingsley
Misty taste of dairy farm, sweat drop in her eye
Country roads, take me home
To the place I belong
Wisconsin, mountain Dark Knight
Take me home, country roads
I hear her voice in the drafter hour, she calls me
The Garmin reminds me my home is far away
Bikin’ down the road, I get a feelin’
That I shouldn’t have dropped her on the way, on the way.
Country roads, take me home
To the place I belong
Wisconsin, mountain Dark Knight
Take me home, country roads
Coach Arms intended to start early, anticipating her first postpartum ride might require a little more draft time. What she didn’t anticipate was the extra time required to quiet two toddlers. “I’m too late to be early”. Speedy’s son delivered her birthday pie on Wednesday, practicing the social distancing Canadian style. The hockey stick IS the standard unit of measure. Ya, heah?
The B team gave Arms a 2 minute head start before rolling out. Loose Screw came out for one last draft in this age category (happy birthday on Sunday). His parting birthday wish: “I’m following you. Please go slow.”
The 4:43 group went off with a bit of a glitch. Pipes missed the B Team start, as she was checking on the well being of her Funtathalon teammate, Special K, and lost track of Drafter time. The accomplishment of running 100 miles (with a calf injury sustained walking her bike up Barlow the previous week) while being sworn in to the State Supreme Court is impressive. But the real challenge is yet to come…
The 4:43 group, aka Dan-yelly, was running late (that’s redundant). Pipes waited patiently (in full winter gear) as she watched the B team gap increase. A newbie arrived even later, adhereing to the Dan-yelly Time Principle. The three departed at 4:50, only to drop Pipes before the end of Middleton Hills (rough reports indicate 4:52). LuLu picked up the slack (not that Pipes is slack) and pulled Pipes out of town. Our newbie has earned the drafter handle, Ditch. He has much to learn about the ways of the draft.
The A team was small in number, but mighty in wattage.
But the ultimate watts were released at 5:15. Rimshot and Blurple were a bit perplexed. “We arrived as instructed, but everyone was gone.” Yup. That’s exactly what a head start means. A plus, team.
Rimshot made a noble attempt to dress in Drafter green. “When is the next Hincapie kit order?”, Rimshot inquired. Drafter response: “The online store closed last week. Didn’t you receive the (dozen) emails?” Rimshot: “Well, yeah, but I had to see if the Drafters passed my one month litmus test.” We bike, we drink beer. What other questions do you have, Rimshot?
Irrefutably, the best post-draft beverages since inception in 2013 were served. Cannibal has been promoted to head mixologist. Sensitive to nutrion and dietary needs, Cannibal made a garden salad with gin.
The female cohort voted unanimously to hire Cannibal to serve drinks at Girls Cabin Weekend 2021, in a French maid outfit, with bikeshorts. “Hey, I cook, too.” Don’t sweat it Cannibal. You’re in.
The gin and arugula conconction was like truth serum for Speedy. Just two sips and endless bits of knowledge were flowing, and could not be stopped. Did you know that there is an organ shaped like a palm tree, and that the lymphatic system is the primary alcohol metabolizer? Me neither, and I teach Anatomy and Physiology. To be fair, there may have been more at play that the gin garden salad. Riding up Pheasant Branch just before the turn off into Middelton Hills, the smell of skunk was overpowering. The black and white creature was never spotted, but a plume of smoke coming from the Conservancy was curious.
The drinks weren’t the only fashionable backyard delight.
A few Drafters were granted an excused absence on the RHCP ride.
Belle was in Iowa, indoctrinating her off-spring to the sport.
Slinger was somewhere in the Driftless region, biking his way through 250 miles.
Kermit and Thing 1 were getting dirty in Hayward.
Noteworthy accomplishments: kudos to Vilks for scoring serious Trek swag, his incentive for completing the 1k challenge in July.
And to Bomber, the new poster boy for The American Birkebeiner.
A little preview of par excellance to come during the Funtathalon this weekend. The LEGEND will be in the rescue boat, and with a little encrouragement, may put on a footin’ show.
Living up to her name, Footer can get er’ done on one, too. Skipper seems to be fearless on land and water.
Monday Aug 10 we will travel to the wild, wild, west and stop at Church FoSho, or Forshaug.
Garmin link: Church Forshaug
Download map and cuesheet: Church Forshaug
Draft responsibly,
BrickO
Draft review in absentia:
Reportedly the most gorgeous Monday evening on record to draft since Drone Master hosted in June, Captain Joe commandeered 17 Drafters on the Spring Valley Route.
The staggered start worked. Sort of. The B Team was off as planned at 4:30. Welcome our newest Drafter, Columbus. Here’s a little snippet of her post-ride response to LuLu’s invitation: “F* you. You said this ride was flat.” All is fair in love and cycling. Just as Christopher Columbus most assuredly knew the earth wasn’t flat when he set sail in 1492 for Asia, the myth that he discovered the world was round makes for a better story. Certainly, Columbus knew Dane county isn’t flat, but this makes for a descent Drafter handle. Welcome to the Draft, where our motto is, “when in doubt, climb.”
Pipes was late to the party, a sort of ground hog day for the Spring Valley loop. Recall her 2019 attempt at catching the group after a late start… instead she caught the broad side of a deer, got disortented and lost, ran out of gas, and called for a ride home. Definitely a stronger finish in 2020.
Dan-yelly was either late to the 4:30 start, or made her own 4:43 group. Given her history, likley the later or latter.
Octane recorded the shortest ride in Drafter history, braking his hanger 10 feet into the Draft.
Speedy did some quick calculations on the Spring Valley route and came up with this offical ratio: 2 hills: 1 valley. Mind you, this is the same mathmatical thinking she devised while drinking beer: 12% alcohol, so drinking half a beer is 6%. Right? Her kids will thrive with home schooling.
It was nice to have three Drafters re-enlist. Welcome back Loose Screw, Booker J and Slow Cow.
The next generation made an appearance.
And someone failed to make an appearance.
When everyone was gone, the sun setting and the left over pizza about to be tossed, Slow Cow showed up.
The only Drafter later than Slow Cow was Surley Bob, who waited until the rain hit Tue to ride.
Queenie waited for the rain to clear… and then 2 more days.
Still, late is better than missing the Draft to go fishin’.
Or digging in the dirt.
Speaking of getting dirty, the Dirty Draft on Wednesday was also a success. Thanks to Walter, trail steward at Blue Mound for the tour.
In other non-cycling news, the Drafters are getting serious about running.
Cookie Monster redefines interval training one month postpartum. Why run-sprint when you can walk-slog? We look forward to having her back in the saddle soon.
Equally impressive, Special K is running her 100 mile event this Saturday, pausing briefly at mile 35 to be sworn in. She is encouraging Drafters to call, collect if necessary, during the run to cheer her to victory. Finally, Formula One, representing our Texas branch, sports her Drafter hat. The Hincapie Gran Fondo annonced today that the race is on in Oct. Looking forward to seeing you there!
REMINDER: If you were part of the Polish Moon Event, I have your beer/coffee/swag and t-shirt. Please collect it this week so I can recover my dinning room table surface.
We will kick off Aug in staggered format, departing from Glacier Ridge Rd: 4:30, 4:43, 5 and 5:15. The route is 33miles, dedicated to Billy Boy. This route indeed takes a left on Johnson, into the woods of Wisconsin.
PDF map and cuesheet download: RHCP Left on Johnson
Draft responsibly,
BrickO
brickosdrafters 
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