Oh, my, my, oh, hell yes
Honey, put on that drafter dress.

Mother Nature smiled upon the Drafters for the last dance on Saturday. The sun rose up to burn off the heavy fog, laying like a thick blanket over Dane County. The wind stayed quiet except for the air moving between the 21 Drafters as they enjoyed one last A-Mazo 50 mile (51.75, it was pointed out) journey together.

Speedy started the Draft off by laying down the hammer… Cashmere Hammer.

It must have really been a “special occasion” as GrannyZilla busted out her new Hincapie Drafter kit!

The ground rules were set. The only hammer being laid down was Cashmere. Cannibal put the bit in his mouth and Skipper and Vilks held the reigns. First red light on the road to Mazomanie and the Draft was still moving as one. Vilks, having aged up to the half century mark the day before, was barely moving.

A few highlights on these final A-Mazo drafters: Pit Stop willed herself back in the saddle after an unfortunate cycling incident (naughty driver never caught). Octane no longer has a pain in his butt after a successful spinal surgery and is back to full gas. Footer kept many Drafters on track by mobilizing their livers. This is not a small task with this group. Speedy had one sip of “sassy ass” sazerac and needed her liver mobilized STAT. GrannyZilla learns to shift gears and a week later, shifts to the front of the Draft. Queenie drafts on Monday but is super on Tuesday. Cannibal reconsiders a career as a cocktail waitress. Han no longer solo, with Princess Leah and their puppy, Watson. Duracell decides to play dirty and buys a MTB! Skipper buys a ski boat, possibly to escape the IMBA paparazzi. Vilks rode nearly 20x times his age, to claim a podium at Race Across the West with Skipper, BrickO and Slim. Vintage rode the A-Mazo 50 on a gravel bike in preparation for his 144 mile gravel grinder next weekend. Didn’t seem to slow him down. Drafter officials are checking for a motor. And the laundry for his eternally absent Drafter gear. Z Wrecks recruited several more UW faculty in order to have a quorum for Monday night faculty meetings. Thing 1 started medical school and could act as a proxy if there isn’t a quorum. Gopher hit the 3k mile mark, up from 2k miles last year. Rimshot was honored as the Son of Shawano after winning Bike the Barns. Belle has taken the world by storm- or maybe by gravel, conquering SBT GVL and Barry Roubaix. Cookie Monster is gaining on her PhD, and on raising one of the most expressive, joyful, raspberry eating kiddos on the planet! Billy Boy rode early and late in the season, and found golf and yoga in between. He often can be heard yelling, FORE, NAMASTE. Pipes has been orchestrating a special yoga session for Billy Boy and Loose Screw, who must wear a helmet during yoga sessions. Pipes holds court every Tuesday AM for Drafters who need help finding their toes and their inner warrior.

Back to the A-Mazo Draft. There was a break away just beyond the Mazomanie town line, with Vintage and Cannibal putting a minute on the peloton. Turns out it wasn’t enough to cover their pit stop.

Mother Nature gave us other calls to stop. A blue heron and bald eagle were spotted. Such a gift to witness their raw beauty. Try as we might to draft in the vortex of our own echelon, we don’t come close to their flight formation. But, these 3 smiles come pretty darn close to capturing raw beauty.

The Drafter code was upheld. Nobody put the hammer down, and Cannibal even put the safety of others before his Strava segment pursuits.

The post-draft festivities were kicked off by Sandlot, our resident poet.

The awards ceremony commenced. Here is a break down of the 2021 winners.

Flat Tire Club: this year’s inductees received a spare inner tube keychain for those unexpected flat tires. Vintage really excelled at this award, flatting 3 times in a single ride.

The Drafters enlisted 13 new members this year, bringing the roster to 137. To recognize their commitment to the draft, bottle openers were awarded. May you draft responsibly: Squeak, Walton, Super Q, Badger, GrannyZilla, Squirrel, Chippendale and T-bone.

Our family is strengthened by new Drafters, and those who draft consistently. Bronze was earned with 10 rides, Silver 15, and Gold for over 20. Earning bronze and a stylish green headband from SweatVac were 13 Drafters: Pit Stop, Duracell, Vintage, Thing 1, Squeak, Granny, Squirrel, Pipes, Busch Latte, Tick Tock, Blurple, Coach Arms and Columbus.

4 Drafters earned a headband and silver Drafter magnet opener, so that beer never leaves the fridge in search of an opener. Congrats to Gopher, Queenie, Footer and LuLu.

Winning gold (headband and two openers, one magnetic for the fridge and the other for traveling to the backyard draft on Monday nights) were 7 Drafters: Speedy, Rimshot, Cannibal, Skipper, Booker J, Z Wrecks and BrickO. The King of the Podium with 22 Drafts was Cannibal, showing that tough guys can wear aprons. And nothing else.

Once you open a beer, you are under oath to draft responsibly. Hence, a personalized coaster. With yet another opening opportunity. Thanks to our friends at ReGEARED for making it happen… albeit cutting it a tad close (UPS arrived during the A-Mazo draft). A special thanks to Columbus for accepting a position in our cartography department. The former map maker was fired after Drafters took a left on Johnson in the woods of Wisconsin and were never heard from again. Cookie Monster remains our head baker, and we are grateful to Gopher for accepting an apprenticeship here at the UW in the Nuclear Baking Department, adding variety to our delicious baked good. Pit Stop receives the inspiration award- reminding us of what life gives us, not focusing on what it takes away. And Octane inspires us to rehab responsibly. Finally, we celebrated 50 years of Vilks hunting carrots in the Serengeti.

The REAL awards are up to speed on the year being 2021. These were just mock ups. Since the actual awards arrived while on the Draft, there was not time for documentation.

Skipper walked away with a….. PAIR OF NEW SOCKS to match the awesome Drafter jerseys he (once again) designed this year, along with weekly photos and the video below. A shout out to Hincapie Sportswear for their Drafter support, keeping us looking sharp and very visible on the road.

Last but not least, we celebrate Pipes, for an uneventful year. She showed up with BOTH wheels and shoes for each event, never hit a deer or fell and broke her wrist. She did show up every Tuesday AM for Drafter Yoga, working hard to open up our hips and minds.

Along with awards was a wide variety of sugar. Billy Boy made gluten free cherry crisp to complement the main course, Birthday Cake!

We were joined by those who couldn’t ride: Pres (kudos for keeping the Drafter spirit post bike trauma), Sandlot, Duchess, Squirrel (on call, saving lives or at least fingers), Badger (bringing babies into the world) and Pipes (who needs to expand her babysitter directory).

In the spirit of Ted Lasso, the Drafters are a family who just happen to ride bikes. We rode from March 9- October 9. On average, 17.5 Drafters (the half was Dan-yelly before the baby was born) drafted 32.7 miles. Our largest turn out was 27 Drafters in May when we were Stuck in Lodi Again. Over 26 rides, we covered 853 miles.

We Drafted together. For funerals, births, promotions, demotions, engagements, weddings, divorces, new puppies and new houses. We Drafted Responsibly.

I’m humbled to be a part of this family, which has no leader, only a core, and thankful for each and every Drafter.

BrickO

An ode to the Doors.

Riders on the storm
Riders on the storm
Into this sport we’re born
Into this draft we’re thrown
Like a dog without a bone
An actor out on loan
Riders on the storm

Mother Nature promised a dry draft, until she didn’t. Too late to call it off when the storm cell appeared at 4PM, the forecast for our 4:30/4:45 rides looked like this:

18 Drafters paid tribute to the Doors and were riders on the storm. The majority of Drafters played it smart and left while the sun was still shining. That’s not to say they all left at 4:30… Newbie Chippendale sauntered in at 4:32. Pretty bold for his debut on the last Monday draft of the season. Once he explained that he had to rent a bike and buy cycling clothes for the evening, the 2 minute tardy slip was torn up. Clearly overheating during the ride, fellow Drafters suggested he shed the jacket. Seems cycling gear is hard to come by- Chippendale was able to purchase shorts and a rain jacket, but no jersey. Free riding.

We do have a dress code. At least on Monday nights. Skipper thought the Chippendale attire was fair game during his Barnyard MTB event on Saturday. Clearly, he was trying his best to join the ranks of Drone Master’s calendar with Miss October Drafters, BrickO and Wampus.

In contrast, GrannyZilla blitzed from clinic, arriving promptly at 4:38PM. You aren’t late if you declare in advance that your “group” is leaving at 4:38PM. In contrast to her colleague Chippendale, GrannyZilla dropped her scrubs to reveal a full cycling kit underneath. Will the final draft be the “special occasion” to don her new Drafter kit??? Granny and Hit-the-Wall, who also rushed from clinic to Draft, are proposing a scheduling template that provides excellent care to all patients up to but not one minute beyond 4PM. Draft responsibly.

Speedy and Duracell also came in hot. As pictured below, only Speedy departed with the 4:30 group. Duracell was running late, and without shoes.

Luckily, Skipper was up to code and back in proper Hincapie gear for the Monday night Draft.

Riders on the storm. Nobody got wet. The rain started to fall just as the last Drafters (Skipper, Rimshot, BrickO, Queenie and Duracell) pulled into the driveway. Duracell, who had secured proper footwear and caught back up, and Queenie should have been in well before the droplets fell, but due to a wrong turn, became the Lantern Rouge. Billy Boy was at the finish line to be sure all Drafters arrived safely, and took great satisfaction in learning that BrickO’s infamous cue sheet once again may have contained misinformation. To be fair, the official Drafter Cartographer, Columbus, was not able to provide her services this week. Typically, the cue sheets are flawless, Billy Boy.

Vintage showed his true colors, riding up to the Drafter code. He took a detour from the Chapel Tour to shelter his wife, Thing 1, from the storm as she commuted home from a hard day of medical school. He might resist wearing green, but his true colors are Drafter.

The rain brought the post-draft festivities in doors. It also blew in some Drafters who couldn’t ride, but may caught wind of the sazeracs. Billy Boy, Coach Arms, Squirrel (also caught up in clinic and signing the petition noted above) and his dog were welcomed additions.

Pipes brought enough sazeracs to keep the troops warm. Speedy thought she was drinking a “sassyass”. Close enough.

Notably absent was Belle, once again recovering from a weekend of crushing gravel at the Barry Roubaix. This Drafter has come into her own this season, from criteriums to gravel racing. For those looking for some gravel adventures, check out the Red Granite Gravel Grinder in Wausau Oct 16. There may also be a Drafter edition of the Dairy Roubaix on Nov 6. Let BrickO know if you are interested.

Speaking of going the distance- HAPPY HALF CENTURY to Vilks this Friday!

The sazerac and aging antidote is readily available Tuesday mornings at 7AM.

The final draft will begin promptly at 9AM on Saturday Oct 9th. There are also a short pour and a shot options for those who want to tap out a bit earlier. All drafts will roll out together. The awards ceremony will commence around 12:30PM and wrap up by 2PM (your hosts have a tailgate party to attend) Please bring a lawn chair, lunch and a beverage (we will have some on tap). IF ANYONE HAS HINCAPIE KIT THAT IS TOO BIG OR TOO SMALL, please bring it on Saturday. I’ll do my best to make it right.

FULL DRAFT

RidewithGPS link A-MAZO FINAL DRAFT

SHORT POUR: this route starts with the full draft, and diverts at mile 18.

RidewithGPS link SHORT POUR

THE SHOT: this 27 mile ride also starts with the full draft and short pour, turning off at Pine at mile 9.5.

RidewithGPS link Final Shot

Draft responsibly,

BrickO

Sweet 16. A great turn out for Pit Stop’s return! 10 weeks after sustaining pelvic, clavicle and thumb fractures, compliments of an inattentive driver, she is back in the saddle. Conquering The RIDE on Sunday with fellow Drafters Sandlot, Duchess, Winston, Gopher and Badger, Pit Stop saddled up with the Drafters to hit Riley Tavern.

Pit Stop was in better shape than her trusty Parlee steed, which suffered a flat right out of the gate. Gopher, LuLu and Squirrel to the rescue.

The rest of the B Team, not realizing they had left a Drafter behind, set out for Riley Tavern. Nearly all members of the dirty dozen were kitted up. Squirrel and GrannyZilla just got the Hincapie Drafter gear this week, but GrannyZilla is saving her green gear for a “special occasion”. Gopher gets a free pass, as his Drafter kit didn’t make the laundry after suffering greatly during the RIDE on Sunday when he rode with a broken spoke.

The A Team was small and mighty happy to pick up Busch Latte near Blackhawk to help rein in Cannibal, whose quads seem to grow stronger each week.

There was also a C Team this week, manned by solo rider, Rimshot. Dressed and ready to ride to Riley Tavern, he stopped off first at the Free House. After a few beers, he drafted responsibly to the finish line, bypassing the Riley Tavern.

September riding in Wisconsin is hard to beat. Riding country roads in nearly 80 degrees, with a gentle breeze, fall colors just starting to pop and black walnuts being the only obstacles.

Backyard festivities were more lively than usual. Captain Joe provided a curious sample to GrannyZilla, raising many things, including questions about its contents. Granted, GrannyZilla is a MD, but how many dermatologists request samples???? Back to her earlier comment about saving her Drafter kit for a special occasion….

Dan-yelly proposed a scavenger hunt for her lost car key, with a reward. Your choice: 6 pack of beer or a play date with her 3 children.

The Drafters had some tired legs after a weekend of athletic endeavors. The Northern Woods welcomed the Birkie Trail Run Drafter Relay team, which placed first in their division.

Which division, you might wonder? “Create your own 26.2”. The trail less traveled is where you will find the Drafters.

The Drafters also found their way north to Shawano Bike the Barn Quilts, where they too dominated the podium, or would have if there had been a podium. Rimshot, BrickO and Z finished 1, 2, 3.

The after party lacked Drafter flair, but the Stubborn Brothers Brewery was only a block away. It appears the Stubborn Brother’s logo may have been heavily influenced by the Drafters.

The last dance will draft by several chapels. And taverns. They seem to go hand in hand in Wisconsin.

RidewithGPS link

While this is the final Monday night draft, please join us for the Final 50 to Mazo on Saturday, October 9 at 9AM. Bring a lunch and beverages to enjoy while we celebrate another wonderful year of drafting during our awards ceremony.

Draft responsibly,

BrickO

18 Drafters rode onto Easy Street and into the Equinox with a 30mph tailwind. There was nothing easy on the return trip! The Big and Tall Drafters were very popular, including Newbie T Bone. Pipes wasn’t able to Draft, but showed up after the ride to make sure the big boy didn’t steal her handle. “I’m Pipes. Obviously. Or at least at one point.”

E$ and Dan-yelly made a debut after a long hiatus (orthopedic residency and 3 children under 5, respectively). To have E$ and Cookie Monster drafting together begged the question, “who is watching your daughter?” E$ reassured us that Millie had things under canine-trol. Dan-yelly, not wanting the night to end, conveniently locked her keys in the car. Unfortunately, her breast pump was also out of reach. Tobacco City Boy earned a gold star for putting the 3 little bears to bed. A huge thanks to Captain and Tennille for bringing Dan-yelly all the way home to Oregon (city, not state).

Second string waiting in anticipation for Cannibal’s arrival. He sent out a clip of Aerosmith performing Pink live. A more appropriate clue would have been songs “Dream On”, “Cryin'” or “I Don’t Want To Miss A Thing”. Showing up a tad late, Cannibal did miss one thing… his opportunity to hit the bathroom, which had him cryin’.

The northern route to Easy Street in Waunakee had us all feeling like rock stars with a southerly 30mph wind. Gopher and BrickO took their turns pulling early. They don’t give PhDs to just anybody.

Cannibal showed up pretty in pink, but there is a reason Drafters wear green. Skipper took one for the team, dropping off the pace line to capture this action photo.

Just south of Dane, the second string came across a Drafter down. Speedy joined the Flat Tire Club. C-Monster followed the Drafter code, stopping to assist with the mechanical, and put her training as an engineer to good use. Footer, also being a well-educated engineer, looked back from the top of the hill heading into Dane and thought, “No f’in way am I going back down the hill to help.” Point well taken: if you are going to flat, be sure your teammates are at the bottom of a hill, not at the top. Chances of following the drafter code go down the further up the hill.

Speedy and C-Monster, weighing in at 200 pounds (together), had a battle ahead with the head wind. The Drafters stopped to take a vote on whether to wait for the twosome. Booker J found an unmarked grassy area (Cannibal had not been here before) and a quorum assembled. It was a split vote until it was realized C-Monster had brought cookies. The vote turned unanimous: wait a short while for C-Monster and Speedy in order to have cookies sooner!

With new found enthusiasm for cookies and beer, Skipper pulled the crew home. There was a bright flash of green heading the opposite way. It was Queenie, setting out on a solo journey. He’d hoped to get further before meeting up with and circling back with the Drafters, but incentivized by cookies and beer, the pace was furious.

Watts were rewarded with more than cookies. E$ and C-Monster brought watermelon from their garden. Cannibal does look pretty in pink. There were gifts and special guest appearances (see above note on Pipes)

Captain and Tennille not only rescued Dan-yelly, but they saved BrickO and Z Wrecks from having to wash beer glasses for another night!

Pit Stop dropped by to share in the post-draft festivities. Several weeks out from her accident, she is back in the saddle! We can’t wait to have her back in the Draft.

Pres is also recovering well. Walton brought his Drafter spirit to the Door County Century.

Pres was there in spirit, while Dan-yelly was there in the flesh. Her longest ride (maybe also her second ride?) of the season, this mother of 3 was not going to be denied her strawberry shortcake at the aid station.

It was a victorious weekend for Mothers of 3, as Squeak conquered the Wisconsin 70.3.

Several Drafters opted for a dirty weekend at the Chequamegon MTB Festival. Congrats to Ninja, LuLu and Vintage.

Back at home, the Dirty Drafters welcomed Newbie, Circus. He opted to ride his MTB, but rumor has it Circus commands a Unicycle. That would be an interesting ride down Howling Wolff.

The Draft next week is truly a Draft destination- Riley Tavern. Departure times will be 4:30 and 4:45.

RidewithGPS link

The end of the year Drafter 50 will happen on Saturday Oct 9th at 9AM (rain date Sunday Oct 10th). Awards to follow. The Trek CX Cup will be held Oct 8-10. If anyone is interested in heading to Waterloo Sunday to watch, let me know.

Draft responsibly,

BrickO

Sweet 16 showed up for Vintage night but only 3 in the original Voler Drafter jersey. Some have gotten lost, and others lost their luster. BrickO’s jersey drew many comments (not to be confused with compliments) from the Drafters. Cannibal: BrickO, did you used to be much larger? LuLu: BrickO, is that a parachute? Is that your B minus jersey? Points all well taken. I think our Drafter 10-year anniversary jersey might be a Hincapie version of this vintage jersey.

Cookie Monster was going to bail on the ride, as E$ was still at work and she hasn’t trained the canine Millie to watch over their toddler, but remembering it was vintage night, she donned her Voler and made the Draft! Coach Arms & Footer wore the original red and blue Hincapie jersey, vintage in its own right.

GrannyZilla showed up at 4:38PM with a big decision: chase down the 4:30 group or hang with the 5PM crowd? Her trusty Bianchi steed was recently outfitted with new chainrings (who knew those shiny chainrings had a purpose?), giving GrannyZilla to confidence to wait. And wait. And wait. The 5PM crew was held up. Again. Waiting on Cannibal. He paid his dues and made amends by pulling all the way down Airport Rd. The Drafters would have let him pull all the way home had it not been for an inconvenient road closing.

Rain fell steady for most of the day, but the skies cleared just in time for the Draft.

It was a short flight on Airport Road, thanks to road construction. Captain Joe had done recon the day before and gave the Drafters a clear runway. Clearly, his copilot, Tennille, was not on board.

Cannibal’s reign came to an end at the road closure, and the pace settled a bit. Until it didn’t. Skipper, feeling spunky in his vintage 1994 purple jersey, had enough residual Race Across the West fitness to make our quads burn. Granny kept referring to Skipper as Sniper, possibly because once he took aim, we all fell. Or maybe she just pays as much attention to Drafter handles as she does changing gears.

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• 

Booker J, too proud to surrender in a pace line, claimed to have a “rock in my shoe”.

There was no way Gopher was pulling up short. After reaching a career high 2k miles in 2020, he has his eye on the 3k prize in 2021. Way to dig deep, Gopher!

We had a Draft by proxy, all the way from Santa Barbara, California! Drone Master was rocking a vintage Drafter headband as he drafted responsibly, yielding at the horse crossing.

The season in turning. Sunlight is fading and temperatures required a fire for the post-draft draft. This year, Z Wrecks upped his fire pit game. No more lawn fires. GrannyZilla thought conditions were too moist to ignite a flame. Little trust she had in the hard wood.

Belle and Bomber came to enjoy the camp fire, and to share with us Belle’s latest adventure: a 166 mile gravel race. From crits to gravel races, this beauty has become a beast!

Tick Tock and company took the vintage theme to Door County for the ride of the century.

In other Drafter sports news, Tree of Rown conquered Ironman WI. Congrats! Check out the support signs… lots of love in the Rowntree family!

We will continue to shorten the drafts, hopeful to ride through September and possibly the first Monday in October. Next week, we will draft Easy Street.

RidewithGPS link

END OF THE YEAR 50 MILE DRAFT will be on Saturday, October 9 at 9AM. Awards to follow. If you have done something really dumb, we’ve noticed. And will celebrate that absurdity in true Drafter fashion.

Draft responsibly,

BrickO

The cumulative fatigue in Drafter legs from the Horribly Hilly Hundreds on Saturday didn’t slow the pace much on the Pine Loop. 18 Drafters drafted, almost 1/3 of them fresh off the 10k climb over 200k event affectionately known as the HHH.

Congratulations to all Drafters who completed what many believe to be the hardest single day event in North America. Thing 1, Ninja, Eden, Octane, Vintage, LuLu, Footer and Booker J went green to represent the Draft. Might as well…. everybody turns green at some point on the HHH.

Our B for Bass Ass team could be supermodels for the Hincapie kits over the past 3 years.

As the Drafters set out for Pine Loop, some of the green race arrows from HHH were still visible on a few choice hills. Counselors were on hand for those still traumatized by the 10k feet of climb. For those who needed comfort food, Gopher stepped up with a dozen home made chocolate chip cookies.

Blurple was on a mission to capture some Strava KOMs, but each acceleration resulted in a cleat-pedal interface failure. “You pulled out too early” seemed to be the theme. Drafting and Planned Parenthood agree there are safety concerns with this method. Tick Tock bided his time while the rest were Strava hunting, and left all in the dust on every climb. The human metronome strikes again.

September 13 the Drafters will show Brains and Braun, headed out west to Cross Plains. If daylight is limited, we will discuss a shorter route.

RidewithGPS link

Look for an email with a Drafter Party survey. Oct 2 and 9 are in the running for a 50 mile ride to Mazo, with awards and beer to follow.

Draft responsibly,

BrickO

A huge thanks to Cannnibal for hosting the Draft and giving Drone Master a wonderful send off.

They crew rolled together, with an eye on the prize (garden drinks).

Queenie captured a classic Wisco “moo”ment just as the sun was setting. Octane, Coach Arms and Speedy celebrated a left turn, avoiding the hill ahead. Quite sure there were others on the route as to conform with the Drafter motto: when in doubt, climb.

• 

• 

• 

Drone Master is one of the original Drafters, so it is only fitting that he reach the pinnacle of his career, joining the flat tire club before moving to sunny California.

• 

• 

Good luck to all the Drafters who are bravely setting out to conquer the Horribly Hilly Hundreds tomorrow. Footer and Ninja are newbies to the HHH, so there should be good war stories to share on Monday!

In other Drafter news, congratulations to Keez for a second place podium finish at Collegiate Conference Championships in MN. A Hawkeye took first, but this Cyclone blew away the Badgers and Gophers.

Not exactly a feat, but BrickO managed not to lose life or limb encountering an Eastern Diamondback Rattlesnake, the most venomous snake in North America.

As we reach the last Monday in August, the sun is setting earlier and we will start to shorten our rides. Pine Loop is 27 miles and includes the freshly repaved segment on KP. For anyone looking to go longer, feel free to skip the left on Pine an continue along Spring Valley to Turkey Road.

RidewithGPS link

Stay tuned for details on the end of the year Drafter ride and party, likely Sat Oct 2 or 9th.

Draft resonsibly,

BrickO

As Joe Cocker predicted, the Drafters Came Together

Here come old Cannibal, he come grooving up slowly
He got gin-gin garden drink, he one holy Drafter
He got quads down to his knee
Got to be a Drafter he just aimin’ to please

He wear no green shine, he got purple road ride
He got ruby red bike shoes, he shoot watt-wattola
He say “I know you, you know me”
One thing I can tell you is you got to drink free
Come together right now over me

He bag fresh produce, he got arugula
He got red solocup, he one cocktail master
He got quads down below his knee
Hold you in his slip stream you can feel his back breeze
Come together right now over me

He roller-crusher, he got every Strava
He got muddy water, he one cocktail maker
He say “One and one and one is three”
Got to be good-looking cos he’s so hard to see
Come together right now over me

Oh
Come together
Yeah come together
Yeah come together
Yeah come together
Yeah come together
Yeah come together
Yeah come together
Yeah oh
Come together
Yeah come together

23 Drafters turned out in fairly equal distributions for an Epic Ride. Or maybe it was for the long awaited Garden Party, with Cannibal’s famous arugula and gin drinks? We even had a Newbie all the way from Green Bay show up for the Garden Party. Welcome to our Garden, Eden.

Vintage suffered some flat tire issues over the weekend. His spirit a bit wounded, he rode with a very not-aerodynamic bag on his handlebars, assumed to hold spare tires. When questioned, he admitted it was full of Charmin. Not sure if that’s to wipe tears or other? It would have been more practical to fill it with tubes and a tire, as he double flatted before we were out of town.

The Drafter Code required waiting for Vintage. The code does not specify helping, just waiting. LuLu dutifully took on that role for flat #1. Flat #2 ended any grandiose thoughts of a Garden Drink finish.

The Epic Loop was a bit confusing for some. Granted, we all were a bit uneasy riding by castles, dinosaurs, Hogwarts, and what appeared to be a dining facility in a prehistoric cave. But Eden was sure that it was a trick to keep Newbies circling about, endlessly. No trick. Just a little on going struggle with RidewithGPS, the program that notes “Turn left” and leaves you guessing where. Along with BrickO doing recon and making several wrong turns for our cartographer, Columbus, to reconcile.

Once the Drafters escaped the Epic Loop, the A Team continued to hang together. Busch Latte tensed up when he heard his Strava segment alert. Cannibal’s alarm didn’t sound for some reason, so there was no need to bust a move. Sometimes the win is remaining a cohesive whole.

Cannibal needed to save his energy on the ride in order to make enough drinks for all 23 Drafters. It might be the first time in history that EVERY Drafter stayed for beverages.

Tennille rode over (on flat tires) to share a garden drink with Captain. Dan-yelly rode for the first time this season (and first time post baby #3). Garden drinks bring out the green in all of us.

In Drafter news, we are sad to say goodbye to Drone Master, who will be moving to California over Labor Day weekend. He plans to Draft responsibly in the sunny state, and hopefully one or two more times with us on Monday night.

Happy Birthday to our Tobacco City Boy (Friday Aug 20)! Happy New House to LuLu and Columbus. We expect a lawn warming party this fall.

Congratulations to Belle on her Steamboat Gravel race. She crushed it. As did Bomber, who supported Belle through the race. Sometimes, racing is the easier role.

Drafter Yoga was a huge success. Thanks to Pipes for keeping it real. Look for more of the same in September. Contact BrickO or Pipes for more details if you are someone you love needs to be more flexible.

The Draft next week will depart from Cannibal’s house. See GroupMe for address, or text me.

RidewithGPS link

Looking ahead, we will Draft on Aug 30 but not the following Monday as it is Labor Day. If you are looking for a group ride that weekend, check out the Wright Stuff Century on Sunday Sept 5.

Lastly, there were a few stragglers who missed the Hincapie Store deadline for Drafter gear. It is open until Aug 22. Link to Hincapie Store here.

Draft responsibly,

BrickO

It’s just another magic Monday (Woah, woah)
Glad it’s not Sunday (Woah, woah)
‘Cause Monday’s my fun day (Woah, woah, woah, woah)
My I get to Draft day (Woah, woah)
It’s just another magic Monday

15 Drafters were Crystal Clear on how they wanted to spend their magic Monday. And nearly all got the memo on wearing the Hincapie Beer and Sprocket jersey!

The A team was small but mighty. Tick Tock arrived to find no one home, and not trusting that more members of the A team would show up at 5PM, set out solo. Have faith, my friend.

Crystal Lake wasn’t exactly crystal clear but beautiful nonetheless.

Rimshot pulled KickA**KK, as she begins the long descent into bonk land. She’s advocating for a name change to BonKK. Keez and BrickO made the turn onto Mussen Rd in Lodi, where they begin their feline rescue mission, with a little Uber help from Squirrel. If orthopedic surgery doesn’t work out for Squirrel, the Human Society will definitely scoop him up.

The post-draft Draft was livelier than usual. No attempt will be made to weave a common thread through these various conversation snippets, or even give them context. GrannyZilla forgot lube. Squirrel tamed a puss. Vilks and GrannyZilla compared the effect of nightly sauna use (not together) on heat shock protein synthesis. GrannyZilla and Sully reviewed 18 holes. “When did Drafter conversations include GOLF???”, rebelled Tick Tock.

The Ride Across the West reunion started with frolicking in the yard (Sully, Vilks and Chief) and ended with wine tasting, well past bedtime.

Here is your weekend recap: A few Drafters had tired legs thanks to Race Day Events bringing back the Dairyland Dare. Congrats to RDE for resurrecting a beautiful and challenging 200k!

The Dairyland Dare crew: Vilks, Z Wrecks and BrickO

Skipper did a different kind of Dare, standing in a rain soaked mosh pit at Utica Fest to hear Queenie’s SuperTuesday band, followed by a tractor pull competition. Little unknown fact for most Drafters: Allice -Chalmers and Farmall tractors are in different divisions. Would’t it be great if cyclists could compete in a division with matched power to mass ratios???? Brilliant.

Keez was double fisted this weekend, racing Age Group Nationals in Milwaukee on Saturday (Olympic) and Sunday (sprint). BrickO, Romeo, Pipes and Pipette were there to cheer her on.

Ninja represented the Drafters in Green Bay. They have a different flare when it comes to fueling stations.

Sandlot and LuLu have been Drafter friends on Strava, but finally drafted together during the Sunday roll. Wow. My heart be still.

Vintage and Thing One have been logging some altitude training days in CO before T1 starts medical school later this month. She’ll go to some very high places in her career!

Belle and Bomber are also habitating in Colorado. Sending lots of hemoglobin love to Belle as she prepares for the Steamboat Gravel 150k on Sunday!

Please allow a retraction from the blog last week. 29 Drafters did not draft. 19 did. The secretary appears to need remedial Excel training, as she counted one Drafter 11 times.

Looking ahead to next week, Cannibal PROMISES not to bail on Garden Drinks. We will draft the Epic Loop, which is basically the Riley Tavern route (short pour) with a little extension through Epic.

Ride with GPS Link Short Pour Riley Tavern

https://ridewithgps.com/routes/37118196

Any volunteers to host the Draft on Monday Aug 23? We will be getting dirty in the Blue Ridge Mountains and not able to host the post-draft draft.

Draft responsibly,

BrickO

A RECORD HIGH 29 cyclists found a way to be a Drafter. Paul Simon would be proud. Or mortified…

The problem is all inside your head, BrickO said to me
The answer is easy if you take it logically
I’d like to help you in your struggle to be green
There must be fifty ways to be a Drafter

She said, it’s really not my habit to intrude
Furthermore, I hope my meaning won’t be lost or misconstrued
But I’ll repeat myself at the risk of being crude
There must be fifty ways to be a Drafter

Fifty ways to be a Drafter

You just slip to the back, Yoda
Make a shorter plan, Columbus
You don’t need to be coy, Billy Boy
Just get yourself green

Hop on the bus, Rimshot
You don’t need to discuss much
Just drop off cookies, C Monster
And get yourself green

She said it grieves me so to see you in such pain
I wish there was something I could do to make you Draft again
I said I appreciate that and would you please explain
About the fifty ways

She said, why don’t we both just ride the route tonight?
And I believe in the morning you’ll begin to see the light
And then she pulled me and I realized she probably was right
There must be fifty ways to be a Drafter
Fifty ways to be a Drafter

You just slip to the back, Booker J
Make a shorter plan, Drone Master
You don’t need criterium hell, Belle
Just get yourself green

Hop on the bus, Tick Tock
You don’t need to drink much
Just stop off to pee, Pit Stop
And get yourself free

The 4:30 line up was impressive. Duracell and Speedy were well rested after a MTB trip in Michigan, and Squirrel and GrannyZilla found more fitness than beer at RAGBRAI. Coach Arms showed up to Draft one last time in this age bracket. HAPPY BIRTHDAY (Thursday)! Squeak gave up on her solo 4:45 departure and drafted responsibly with the 4:30 group. Pres made his first public appearance in the Drafter office since the 2021 election, and brought along a guy he met at Walmart. Welcome to our newbie, Walton.

The 5PM Drafting squad felt the force, as Yoda joined the other Jedi’s on their quest to Viaduct. Cannibal looked more reptilian than human with his road rash scales, but he was too strong to be overtaken by the dark side.

There was some disturbance in the force early on in the ride. Cannibal apparently got caught up in a galactic storm, “I saw metal flying”. His lightsaber glowed a little less brightly when he realized only two dedicated Drafter Knights, Rimshot and Booker J, stayed by his side.

They used the force to catch the rest of the Jedi Drafters , gaining speed for the climb up Viaduct.

Not everyone gained a head of steam for the climb. Pres and Walton stopped to appreciate the Viaduct, currently operated by the Wisconsin and Southern Railroad. Built in 1881, the stone arch sees roughly two trains per day, and on this day, 29 Drafters.

Captain Joe Drafted early in the day, hoping to catch one of the trains to Oregon for a visit with Tobacco City Boy, Dan-yelly and their trio.

What goes up, must come down. And down Bonetti Rd we flew. The G forces must have been great enough to spin LuLu’s chain right off the chainring. “There goes my F’in average” cursed Vilks, as he obeyed the Drafter code, stopping to help LuLu.

And back up Meek Rd, not for the meek Drafter.

Back on Glacier Ridge, the Drafter Masters celebrated a successful Viaduct Route with nectar of the Gods. Skipper brought a Rocky Road smoothie-style wheat ale from WeldWerks Brewing Co. Works for me!

There is much to celebrate!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY to Coach Arms (Aug 4), Billy Boy (Aug 6) and Loose Screw (Aug 9).

Congratulations to K2 for reaching the summit of her PhD defense this morning!

Special K crushed her 100 mile race on Sat in just under 30 hours. And this time, without kidney failure.

Finally, the Lake Ripley Ride for JDRF on Saturday has an extraordinary Drafter turnout. 13 “regular” Drafters plus BrickO’s aunt and cousin. Cookie Monster and Lil’ Monster joined up with the crew afterwards to enjoy Footer’s cottage and hospitality.

The Sunday Roll is gaining traction. A heartfelt thanks to all the Drafters who came out to help build momentum.

Next Monday, we will celebrate with a few of the RAW SpokeN’Four crew who are making a Drafter debut to enjoy Cannibal’s famous garden drinks. Draft responsibly.

The drinks are the same color as Crystal Lake. Drafter green. But the ride is still pretty.

RidewithGPS link

Draft resonsbily,

BrickO