Oh, my, my, oh, hell yes
Honey, put on that drafter dress.

Mother Nature smiled upon the Drafters for the last dance on Saturday. The sun rose up to burn off the heavy fog, laying like a thick blanket over Dane County. The wind stayed quiet except for the air moving between the 21 Drafters as they enjoyed one last A-Mazo 50 mile (51.75, it was pointed out) journey together.

Speedy started the Draft off by laying down the hammer… Cashmere Hammer.

It must have really been a “special occasion” as GrannyZilla busted out her new Hincapie Drafter kit!

The ground rules were set. The only hammer being laid down was Cashmere. Cannibal put the bit in his mouth and Skipper and Vilks held the reigns. First red light on the road to Mazomanie and the Draft was still moving as one. Vilks, having aged up to the half century mark the day before, was barely moving.

A few highlights on these final A-Mazo drafters: Pit Stop willed herself back in the saddle after an unfortunate cycling incident (naughty driver never caught). Octane no longer has a pain in his butt after a successful spinal surgery and is back to full gas. Footer kept many Drafters on track by mobilizing their livers. This is not a small task with this group. Speedy had one sip of “sassy ass” sazerac and needed her liver mobilized STAT. GrannyZilla learns to shift gears and a week later, shifts to the front of the Draft. Queenie drafts on Monday but is super on Tuesday. Cannibal reconsiders a career as a cocktail waitress. Han no longer solo, with Princess Leah and their puppy, Watson. Duracell decides to play dirty and buys a MTB! Skipper buys a ski boat, possibly to escape the IMBA paparazzi. Vilks rode nearly 20x times his age, to claim a podium at Race Across the West with Skipper, BrickO and Slim. Vintage rode the A-Mazo 50 on a gravel bike in preparation for his 144 mile gravel grinder next weekend. Didn’t seem to slow him down. Drafter officials are checking for a motor. And the laundry for his eternally absent Drafter gear. Z Wrecks recruited several more UW faculty in order to have a quorum for Monday night faculty meetings. Thing 1 started medical school and could act as a proxy if there isn’t a quorum. Gopher hit the 3k mile mark, up from 2k miles last year. Rimshot was honored as the Son of Shawano after winning Bike the Barns. Belle has taken the world by storm- or maybe by gravel, conquering SBT GVL and Barry Roubaix. Cookie Monster is gaining on her PhD, and on raising one of the most expressive, joyful, raspberry eating kiddos on the planet! Billy Boy rode early and late in the season, and found golf and yoga in between. He often can be heard yelling, FORE, NAMASTE. Pipes has been orchestrating a special yoga session for Billy Boy and Loose Screw, who must wear a helmet during yoga sessions. Pipes holds court every Tuesday AM for Drafters who need help finding their toes and their inner warrior.

Back to the A-Mazo Draft. There was a break away just beyond the Mazomanie town line, with Vintage and Cannibal putting a minute on the peloton. Turns out it wasn’t enough to cover their pit stop.

Mother Nature gave us other calls to stop. A blue heron and bald eagle were spotted. Such a gift to witness their raw beauty. Try as we might to draft in the vortex of our own echelon, we don’t come close to their flight formation. But, these 3 smiles come pretty darn close to capturing raw beauty.

The Drafter code was upheld. Nobody put the hammer down, and Cannibal even put the safety of others before his Strava segment pursuits.

The post-draft festivities were kicked off by Sandlot, our resident poet.

The awards ceremony commenced. Here is a break down of the 2021 winners.

Flat Tire Club: this year’s inductees received a spare inner tube keychain for those unexpected flat tires. Vintage really excelled at this award, flatting 3 times in a single ride.

The Drafters enlisted 13 new members this year, bringing the roster to 137. To recognize their commitment to the draft, bottle openers were awarded. May you draft responsibly: Squeak, Walton, Super Q, Badger, GrannyZilla, Squirrel, Chippendale and T-bone.

Our family is strengthened by new Drafters, and those who draft consistently. Bronze was earned with 10 rides, Silver 15, and Gold for over 20. Earning bronze and a stylish green headband from SweatVac were 13 Drafters: Pit Stop, Duracell, Vintage, Thing 1, Squeak, Granny, Squirrel, Pipes, Busch Latte, Tick Tock, Blurple, Coach Arms and Columbus.

4 Drafters earned a headband and silver Drafter magnet opener, so that beer never leaves the fridge in search of an opener. Congrats to Gopher, Queenie, Footer and LuLu.

Winning gold (headband and two openers, one magnetic for the fridge and the other for traveling to the backyard draft on Monday nights) were 7 Drafters: Speedy, Rimshot, Cannibal, Skipper, Booker J, Z Wrecks and BrickO. The King of the Podium with 22 Drafts was Cannibal, showing that tough guys can wear aprons. And nothing else.

Once you open a beer, you are under oath to draft responsibly. Hence, a personalized coaster. With yet another opening opportunity. Thanks to our friends at ReGEARED for making it happen… albeit cutting it a tad close (UPS arrived during the A-Mazo draft). A special thanks to Columbus for accepting a position in our cartography department. The former map maker was fired after Drafters took a left on Johnson in the woods of Wisconsin and were never heard from again. Cookie Monster remains our head baker, and we are grateful to Gopher for accepting an apprenticeship here at the UW in the Nuclear Baking Department, adding variety to our delicious baked good. Pit Stop receives the inspiration award- reminding us of what life gives us, not focusing on what it takes away. And Octane inspires us to rehab responsibly. Finally, we celebrated 50 years of Vilks hunting carrots in the Serengeti.

The REAL awards are up to speed on the year being 2021. These were just mock ups. Since the actual awards arrived while on the Draft, there was not time for documentation.

Skipper walked away with a….. PAIR OF NEW SOCKS to match the awesome Drafter jerseys he (once again) designed this year, along with weekly photos and the video below. A shout out to Hincapie Sportswear for their Drafter support, keeping us looking sharp and very visible on the road.

Last but not least, we celebrate Pipes, for an uneventful year. She showed up with BOTH wheels and shoes for each event, never hit a deer or fell and broke her wrist. She did show up every Tuesday AM for Drafter Yoga, working hard to open up our hips and minds.

Along with awards was a wide variety of sugar. Billy Boy made gluten free cherry crisp to complement the main course, Birthday Cake!

We were joined by those who couldn’t ride: Pres (kudos for keeping the Drafter spirit post bike trauma), Sandlot, Duchess, Squirrel (on call, saving lives or at least fingers), Badger (bringing babies into the world) and Pipes (who needs to expand her babysitter directory).

In the spirit of Ted Lasso, the Drafters are a family who just happen to ride bikes. We rode from March 9- October 9. On average, 17.5 Drafters (the half was Dan-yelly before the baby was born) drafted 32.7 miles. Our largest turn out was 27 Drafters in May when we were Stuck in Lodi Again. Over 26 rides, we covered 853 miles.

We Drafted together. For funerals, births, promotions, demotions, engagements, weddings, divorces, new puppies and new houses. We Drafted Responsibly.

I’m humbled to be a part of this family, which has no leader, only a core, and thankful for each and every Drafter.

BrickO

An ode to the Doors.

Riders on the storm
Riders on the storm
Into this sport we’re born
Into this draft we’re thrown
Like a dog without a bone
An actor out on loan
Riders on the storm

Mother Nature promised a dry draft, until she didn’t. Too late to call it off when the storm cell appeared at 4PM, the forecast for our 4:30/4:45 rides looked like this:

18 Drafters paid tribute to the Doors and were riders on the storm. The majority of Drafters played it smart and left while the sun was still shining. That’s not to say they all left at 4:30… Newbie Chippendale sauntered in at 4:32. Pretty bold for his debut on the last Monday draft of the season. Once he explained that he had to rent a bike and buy cycling clothes for the evening, the 2 minute tardy slip was torn up. Clearly overheating during the ride, fellow Drafters suggested he shed the jacket. Seems cycling gear is hard to come by- Chippendale was able to purchase shorts and a rain jacket, but no jersey. Free riding.

We do have a dress code. At least on Monday nights. Skipper thought the Chippendale attire was fair game during his Barnyard MTB event on Saturday. Clearly, he was trying his best to join the ranks of Drone Master’s calendar with Miss October Drafters, BrickO and Wampus.

In contrast, GrannyZilla blitzed from clinic, arriving promptly at 4:38PM. You aren’t late if you declare in advance that your “group” is leaving at 4:38PM. In contrast to her colleague Chippendale, GrannyZilla dropped her scrubs to reveal a full cycling kit underneath. Will the final draft be the “special occasion” to don her new Drafter kit??? Granny and Hit-the-Wall, who also rushed from clinic to Draft, are proposing a scheduling template that provides excellent care to all patients up to but not one minute beyond 4PM. Draft responsibly.

Speedy and Duracell also came in hot. As pictured below, only Speedy departed with the 4:30 group. Duracell was running late, and without shoes.

Luckily, Skipper was up to code and back in proper Hincapie gear for the Monday night Draft.

Riders on the storm. Nobody got wet. The rain started to fall just as the last Drafters (Skipper, Rimshot, BrickO, Queenie and Duracell) pulled into the driveway. Duracell, who had secured proper footwear and caught back up, and Queenie should have been in well before the droplets fell, but due to a wrong turn, became the Lantern Rouge. Billy Boy was at the finish line to be sure all Drafters arrived safely, and took great satisfaction in learning that BrickO’s infamous cue sheet once again may have contained misinformation. To be fair, the official Drafter Cartographer, Columbus, was not able to provide her services this week. Typically, the cue sheets are flawless, Billy Boy.

Vintage showed his true colors, riding up to the Drafter code. He took a detour from the Chapel Tour to shelter his wife, Thing 1, from the storm as she commuted home from a hard day of medical school. He might resist wearing green, but his true colors are Drafter.

The rain brought the post-draft festivities in doors. It also blew in some Drafters who couldn’t ride, but may caught wind of the sazeracs. Billy Boy, Coach Arms, Squirrel (also caught up in clinic and signing the petition noted above) and his dog were welcomed additions.

Pipes brought enough sazeracs to keep the troops warm. Speedy thought she was drinking a “sassyass”. Close enough.

Notably absent was Belle, once again recovering from a weekend of crushing gravel at the Barry Roubaix. This Drafter has come into her own this season, from criteriums to gravel racing. For those looking for some gravel adventures, check out the Red Granite Gravel Grinder in Wausau Oct 16. There may also be a Drafter edition of the Dairy Roubaix on Nov 6. Let BrickO know if you are interested.

Speaking of going the distance- HAPPY HALF CENTURY to Vilks this Friday!

The sazerac and aging antidote is readily available Tuesday mornings at 7AM.

The final draft will begin promptly at 9AM on Saturday Oct 9th. There are also a short pour and a shot options for those who want to tap out a bit earlier. All drafts will roll out together. The awards ceremony will commence around 12:30PM and wrap up by 2PM (your hosts have a tailgate party to attend) Please bring a lawn chair, lunch and a beverage (we will have some on tap). IF ANYONE HAS HINCAPIE KIT THAT IS TOO BIG OR TOO SMALL, please bring it on Saturday. I’ll do my best to make it right.

FULL DRAFT

RidewithGPS link A-MAZO FINAL DRAFT

SHORT POUR: this route starts with the full draft, and diverts at mile 18.

RidewithGPS link SHORT POUR

THE SHOT: this 27 mile ride also starts with the full draft and short pour, turning off at Pine at mile 9.5.

RidewithGPS link Final Shot

Draft responsibly,

BrickO