What a sweet last dance. The weather cooperated beautifully and the daylight held out just long enough to see a record 22 Drafters round the corner from Riley Tavern to the Free House. Several rounded the wrong way, but it wouldn’t be a suitable official end of the season without Drafters gone astray. Tick Tock halted the lead peloton and made the executive decision to turn left on Old Sauk, sighting Rule V. “BrickO would have us climb every last hill, including Twin Valley and Blackhawk. Harden the F up, Cannibal and Booker J, and turn left.” Many of the ensuing Drafters failed to yield Rule V and turned right, eluding the elevation gain- which is always the wrong way.
Drafter quads were a bit sluggish from the RIDE the day before. Cannibal was sporting his RIDE number, definitely a Velominati violation of rule 57. Skeeter Bait, Footer, Whamo and Sandlot rode the full 100. Skeeter pulled Footer for the first 50, before saying, “so long, farewell, auf Wiedersehen, adieu. I’d like to stay but I need to taste my first cold beer before you.” Whamo and Sandlot managed to avoid the medical tent, a definite improvement over Tyranena. Cookie Monster, E$, K2 and Billy Bob missed the 60 mile mass start, kindly waiting for fellow Drafter Dan-yelly. Who would have guessed she’d be running late? I’m sensing a name change in 2019. Equally predictable, BrickO got off track and ended up riding on Highway on 151 before engaging in some cross bike over the shoulder maneuver and billy goating down the steep embankment to find traffic traveling less than 70mph. Sheesh.
I am directionally impaired, but I had other more pressing impairments to contend with during the RIDE on Sunday. For one, I was exhausted from the Bride Ride on Friday. Haven’t heard of it? Likely because only a few women have lived to tell the tale. 4 to be precise. The Bride Ride itself was only 20 miles, but the first half into a 30 knot headwind. As the story goes, the wind changed direction, such that a 30 knot headwind was enjoyed the entire loop. Pipes hadn’t been on two wheels since the birth of her daughter 3 years ago. Once an Olympian, always up for the games. The physical demands of the Bride Ride required immediate resuscitation at the Missouri Tavern, which was CLOSED ON A FRIDAY BEFORE NOON IN WISCONSIN. What the???? Fortunately for the bridal party, the Craftsman was open and dark beers readily available. Seeking nourishment after 20 miles of pedaling, the bridal party feasted. Dr. Wampus, concerned for our health, insisted on medicinal doses of whiskey and several other Drafters arrived on the scene to render nutritional support.
A quick shout out to Dr. Lucius Corr for his gallant attempt to make the wedding. When plans fell through, he rode in honor of the Draft.
The Bride Ride is a two day stage race. The elements were not a factor in stage 2, which was held indoors at the Overture Center velodrome. This stage is well known for its cookie toss, an extremely dangerous display of athleticism and precise aim.
An acknowledgment to Ruthie Hauge Photography- I’m quite sure she had never been asked to take a Drafter bridal party photo quite like this.
So, in short, I had good reason to be a little fuzzy on the directions during the RIDE on Sunday AM. Where are we in this story? Back to the Monday night Draft. With 22 Drafters all staying for dinner, and a few more making appearances, we had a total take over of the front patio.
The 11% Evil Twin was no match for Footer. Speedy and D2 Duracell took a sip and there were immediate repercussions. Speedy did the quick math and calculated that she had drunk 8/9 of a sip and therefore consumed 0.97% alcohol. When waitress Amy asked Duracell how he wanted his burger done, he said “with coleslaw, please”.
I think the Evil Twin should not be underestimated. Look what evil fun Footer and Skeeter Bait had at CamRock this weekend?
BrickO and Z felt like the weather was evil on Saturday as they rode the Shawano Bike the Barn Quilts. I’d say the name lacks luster, and while it is true that the terrain is less evil than CamRock, the 30 degree start made us earn the green jersey.
The Drafter family brings me such joy- and I am honored to ride each with with all of you. Thank you for being kind to one another, pushing each other to be stronger and faster, and for putting all the “stuff” aside and enjoying a beer with one another at the end of the night. I have your back, and know you have mine. I’m not big on math and even less of a fan of statistics. I don’t need numbers to know that this group is significant.
| 2016 | 2017 | 2018 | |
| Total riders | 45 | 41 | 51 |
| Average riders | 12.8 | 11.8 | 15.5 |
| Max riders | 19 | 20 | 22 |
| Newbies | 22 | 11 | 19 |
| Number of rides | 21 | 21 | 19 |
| Start- end dates | March 14- Sept 27 | March 20- Sept 25 | April 23- Sept 24 |
| Most appearances | 19 Dan-yelly | 16 Cookie Monster | 16 Tick Tock |
Two other awards to be given out: 1) Flat tire club inductees: Booker J, Skeeter Bait and Tick Tock and 2) best Drafter photo: for the category of most miles traveled, Billy Bob; for the category of most committed, Cookie Monster and E$; and for capturing the most Drafters under one rainbow, Skeeter Bait.
I wish you all a wonderful hibernation and look forward to Drafting again next spring.
D
Draft responsibly,
BrickO
brickosdrafters 
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