Pffttttt. All 15 of us heard it, reverberating loud and clear throughout the stratosphere of the BMO parking lot as we lined up to depart on the Pine Pedal Push. Arms, looking somewhat aghast, claimed responsibility. Welcome to the Flat Tire Club! When Rainbow Maker suffered the same pffffate, he and 4 other orthopedic surgeons managed to change the tire in, oh, 25min flat. I’m sure the tire lever instruments weren’t up to par; certainly our Bone Menders can repair something as simple as a flat tire, right? Fortunately for Arms, Newbie Drafter Colin O’Brien of Cronometro was there to show us how it’s done. In a flash, out with the old and in with the new, and we were wheels up without delay. Flash might be new to riding with the Draft, but not a new face in our group. The lion’s share of Drafters have purchased their bikes and/or had their bikes fit by the Flash. He’s a former USA Hour Record Holder (if you’ve never cycled on a Velodrome, you should), world renowned bike- fitter, patent holder for cool cycling stuff and beer drinker extraordinaire.
Changing tires isn’t the only thing Flash does fast. B2 Bomber, Captain Joe and The Flash kept the pace line above 30mph on the way down Schneider Rd. Flash is still recovering from the Italian Screw Job, which claimed some of his hip function after a crash in Tuscany. The screw comes out in early Oct, so we will see how that impacts his acceleration. As I held on by a thread to the pace line led by the Flash, I secretly hope the Italian screw removal doesn’t translate into more power! Speaking of hips, One Hip Wonder is now Too Hip. Crutches are slowing him down for now, but we expect great things in the spring. Here’s to a speedy recovery, Too Hip! In other screw news, Loose Screw is practicing safe yoga, a safety measure mandated after his previous tip over.
For those interested in Safe Yoga, we meet Monday at the VFW on Century Ave in Middleton at 6AM. There are still safe spots available. Email Karen Rigsby if you are interested in expanding your motion: karenkraftrigsby@gmail.com
Channel 27 News Reporter Zach Nelson (aka Tobacco City Cousin) covered the sports edition of the Drafter broadcast for the week, dutifully leaving live coverage of Hurricane Irma to report on Drafter athletic feats. Congrats to Wisconsin Ironman finishers, Legs and MP Hilly. Word has it that Legs called Loose Screw to get the Drafter discount on nemesis bags. His dutiful wife, Arms, gets the wifey award for bringing him fudge ice cream at 11PM to aid his post IM recovery. MadPower Hilly DOMINATED her age group, despite a near catastrophic bike crash 3 weeks before the event. I predict that it won’t be long before this Drafter sees the lava fields.
Congrats to the Human Metronome and Dan-yelly on the Door County Century. As a new mother, Dan-yelly has been limited to a 40 miles max distance riding this summer, and yet found the strength to finish a century. Damn. You go Girl.
An update on the Drafter outrageous photo completion results: we have a new entry that rivals the African Safari elephant pose submitted by Arm and Legs. Big Foot, Heather Hartwig Stokes, has me inflicted with a serious case of calf envy. My good friend, foot and ankle surgeon, and fellow Drafter, Dr. Katie Wampus, has diagnosed me with an accessory soleus, frequently and sadly misdiagnosed as a cancle. Although I am an accessory soleus card holder, with no shame about the size of the tissue around my ankles, I seriously would trade calves with Big Foot and even throw in my new Cervelo to sweeten the deal. Holy crap. Can you imagine what it feels like to barefoot behind a boat at 40mph, nearly twice our average on a Drafter ride????? Big Foot starts face down, feet towards the boat. It is a thing of strength and beauty. Neither of which I possess, but can appreciate.
Did you catch the reference to my new Cervelo? Her name is Red Dog. I believe every bike needs a name. My Kestrel is Ruby, my Colnago is Annie, etc. I picked her up at Cronometro yesterday, which happened to be my Grandmothers birthday. I grew up on my Grandma’s farm, and per my previous and loquacious blog entry, you know that this included being born in a milking parlor affectionally called the “Cow Palace” and indoctrination into cycling was by means of a motor.
What I failed to mention is our beloved Irish Setter, Red Dog. She was a stray, and my parents warned my not to get attached, as it was likely she would be claimed. After several weeks of running ads in the Edgerton Reporter (this was decades before the Internet or even touch tone phones), when we were sure nobody would claim her, we adopted her into our family. The descriptive name “Red Dog” was never changed. She ran like the wind and was most happy to be outside chasing bird shadows. My new Cervelo has many of the same tendencies, and today, at the Tyranena Oktoberfest bike ride, I new that “Red Dog” was the right name for her.
Sadly, the hair and bust fullness from 1977 to 2017 has gone largely unchanged, while the fullness of the lower quadrant and experienced exponential growth. Still, the thrill of a new bike and going fast (a relative term) on two wheels is as exhilarating now as it was in second grade.
Congrats to Z and AquaPhobe on their strong Tyranena finish. There were no hills to challenge our mitochondria, but a great selection of strong beers at the end to challenge our livers. Tomorrow is The RIDE, so please come out and support the UW Cancer Center if you can! My good friend, Deric Wheeler, is in charge and is one helluva good guy. We were graduate students together at the UW. He’s now a tenured professor and I’m writing this blog. So there’s that. If you RIDE, please join me, Z, CM Wille and Arms for a Draft.
For Monday, we have a ride down Easy Street in Waunakee. There’s not short pour, since this ride is a short pour.
Reminder: if you want to join winter Spin on Monday nights at Supreme starting 6:30PM or indoor cycling at CXC Tue at 10AM, please email me ASAP. We have a few spots left for Spin and need a few more bodies to make CXC fly. Thanks.
Draft responsibly,
BrickO
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